Private Tales Trapped Inside One's Mind

[Katja]

Gods, the way he froze, wide eyed and utterly flustered. Perhaps, she had overstepped..

Katja bit the inside of her cheek, dropping her gaze as if suddenly fascinated by her bare feet. Her toes curled against the floor, and she exhaled a quiet laugh.

"Oh, I won’t..." she murmured, voice softer than she intended.

She wasn't entirely sure why she'd done it. No - that was a lie. She'd done it because he'd humoured her. Because he'd danced with her. Because he had saved her life. Because, for the first time in what felt like forever, she had company that didn’t feel like a burden to endure.

Or maybe it was just the alcohol making her bolder than she had any right to be.

She cleared her throat, expecting him to seize the excuse she'd so graciously given him, to retreat, back into rifling through Evander’s things. But then the music started again, a different song weaving through the air, and her snapped up surprise, first to the music box, and then to him.

Her brows dipped for only a moment as she took him in, and a slow, knowing smile curled at the corner of her lips.

"It appears so..." she murmured, tucking a stray tress of hair behind her ear.

And then, a little more shyly than before, she closed the distance between them, lifting her hand in invitation.

"I suppose, if the music insists.."

 

[Alistair Krixus]

Alistair did his best to ignore his own blushing as he saw her one before accepting her hand. He was already trying to spit out some better excuse besides the obvious fact that he just wanted to dance with her.

"None of the items are moving, and today is still a day for celebration, I believe." He offered, and then, shortly after, he cleared his throat.

This time, when they danced, Alistair was way quicker to let himself enjoy the moment. His movements were looser, and for that reason, maybe a bit clumsier, but what he lacked in elegance this go-around was made up for by the smile on his face and a genuine willingness to enjoy the moment.

How many times had he truly allowed himself to relax like this, especially in such an unknown setting, could be counted on one hand. Those people that had managed to pull it out of him were even fewer. And Alistair was very quick to push those people from his mind.

Katja

 

[Katja]

Katja’s fingers curled around his as he took her hand, and though she tried to act as though it were nothing, her heart gave an entirely traitorous little flutter.

She tilted her head at his reasoning. That was the excuse he went with? She bit back a smirk.

"Mhmm," she hummed, amusement warm in her eyes. "Very logical.." she teased, stepping in closer as he settled his other hand at her waist.

This time was different.

The tension that had held him so rigid before had melted, leaving behind something looser, something freer. He still wasn’t graceful, exactly, but there was something endearing in the way he moved now, clumsy, unguarded, and smiling.

That smile. She had seen him smirk, had seen him scoff.. But this one was something else entirely. And she was selfish enough to want to keep it.

Her grip on his hand eased, her fingers lacing lightly through his. Her other hand drifted upward, settling gently against his shoulder as they swayed through the shifting candlelight. She hadn’t realised just how close they had become, or maybe she had and was only pretending she didn’t.

A slow breath left her, the last remnants of hesitation slipping away with it, and she let herself tip forward, resting her head lightly against his shoulder.

The steady rise and fall of his breath beneath her cheek was soothing, his warmth a quiet comfort, and gods, she should pull away. She should laugh this off, blame the alcohol and tease him about his footwork or say something to make it less... whatever this was.

But she didn’t. Instead, she closed her eyes for just a moment longer, letting the music and the gentle cadence of their movements lull her into something dangerously close to contentment as her hand slipped slightly, and her fingertips gently tapped the rhythm of the music against his chest.

 

[Alistair Krixus]

For all of the looseness and joy that Alistair was feeling as he slowly gave into the moment around him, Katja would certainly feel that spike of stiffness return as she settled her head onto his shoulder. However, just as quickly as it was there, Alistair forced it away. That stiff, by-the-books demeanor was not what was needed at the moment. Katja wanted someone that could just be there in the moment with her, and it was the least he could do.

He was sure that she could probably hear the pounding of his heart with her head resting so close, but even so, Alistair held her, his hand drifting to the small of her back and just stood their slightly swaying with the soft music.

Any attempt at words from him would have either resulted in him stumbling over them or completely ruining the moment, so he remained silent. The message was clear.

For tonight, I'm here as long as you need me.

Katja

 

[Katja]

Time slipped away, unnoticed and unimportant, as they swayed together in the quiet embrace of the music. There was no urgency, no expectation, only warmth, only presence. She had never had such presence. The world outside her own little bubble might as well have ceased to exist.

Katja barely noticed when the music came to an end. Even in the silence, they lingered, the ghost of the melody still twining around them. She should move. She knew that. But his shoulder had proven a terribly comfortable resting place, and she wasn’t quite ready to let go. Not yet.

Her breath was slow and even, her head still nestled lightly against the fabric of his collar. A part of her wished she could press pause and keep this moment, just as it was, for a little longer. But, eventually, reality came creeping back in.

With a quiet inhale, she lifted her head, blinking up at him. Her eyes, still glassy with the remnants of wine and warmth, shone faintly in the dim light, something unreadable flickering behind them.

She hesitated.

Something in her chest ached to tell him, to say something that might begin to describe how much this night, this moment, meant to her. But every word that came to mind felt wrong. Too much or not enough.

She studied him, searching, as if the answer might somehow be found in the soft planes of his face.

For a fraction of a second, she almost dared.

Then...No.

Her throat tightened, and she swallowed against it. The worst possible outcome flashed unbidden through her mind, and the courage she'd barely begun to gather scattered like ash on the wind.

Pitiful. Pathetic girl.

So, instead, she mustered a lazy smile, letting the moment slip between her fingers before she could do anything reckless.

"Thank you...Again..." she murmured, voice softer now, like some part of her still wasn’t quite ready to break away. A pause, then a quiet, breathy laugh. "I should probably sit down for a bit and let you get on with it."

 

[Alistair Krixus]

A moment. How often was Alistair allowed to enjoy these tiny moments? By others or by himself, it had become normalized that his life was spent flitting from one problem to the next, from one person to the next, never spending too much time on any one thing. Moments were to be solved and then left for others, but...

Had he solved everything here? Even so, he did not want to leave. To break away, to end all of this, symbolized a rising mournfulness in his soul. For the first time in a long time, Alistair was standing still with this girl in his arms. And he knew that the moment he took that next step, he would be right back to running to the next problem. Who knew when he would get the chance to stop again?

That was why he was so afraid to speak, even to move might break this magical pause on his life. This moment, unaffected by his past or future, all that mattered was this present moment.

And like glass, it shattered with the lightest movement of Katja's head from his shoulder. The absence of that warmth kindled from her head and his chest felt more like a dousing of ice water than the insignificant movement that it actually was.

Then she was looking at him with those beautiful eyes, and he wanted nothing more than for her to lean her head back down. His mind was lost in that desire and want for that moment that could never be perfectly repeated. His ideas swam with possible chances to replicate such a state, but none felt remotely possible.

Wait, she was talking to him. He had almost completely ignored her, but he managed to catch the last words. Judging by the context, she must be done with holding on to him. He must have been holding on like a drowning man holds a life raft without even realizing it.

"Oh, yes...right. I'll just...get back to work."

He tried to offer his own awkward laugh before slowly shifting to turn to face the rest of the room. What was he doing again?

Oh, the artifacts.

Katja

 

[Katja]

Was that disappointment she felt when he did not insist they dance a little longer? That he had not offered a quiet don’t go just yet, or allowed his hand to hold onto her just before she could slip away completely? Nothing like being imprisoned in an evil mage’s manor to turn a girl into a hopeless romantic.. But still, after everything that had happened today and all the years before it, it had been more than a comfort to be held for a moment.

But she had already taken so much of his time and had pushed her luck far enough.. He owed her nothing, and she owed him everything.

Her brows rose slightly at the way he fumbled for words, her head canting with gentle amusement as a soft, shy laugh escaped her, her shoulders shaking with it before she gave him some mercy and stepped away, her fingers lacing together in front of her as she looked briefly down, cheeks blazing.

Her head shook lightly at how nervous he made her. Ridiculous.

"I'll keep out of your way..." she said lightly, her voice calm despite the way her heart still punched at her ribs. She offered him a small smile, warm and retreating, before she turned and made her way toward a stack of books piled neatly at the side of the room.

She plucked the top one from the stack, settled herself into a nearby armchair with a quiet hmph, and cracked the book open in her lap. She found herself watching him from behind the safety of the pages, her gaze drifting above the book’s edge to follow his every movement.

Her feet kicked absently where they hovered just above the floor, idle and content but brimming with an energy she couldn’t quite release.

She had danced. Really danced. And her heart hadn’t slowed since.

 

[Alistair Krixus]

Alistair quickly shuffled over to the rows of items that lined the room. His hands traced through the air, writing on some document only he could see. He tried his very best to get lost in the work before him. That would be the easiest source of escape; this was what he was used to doing. Just one piece of work after the next.

And yet...as he made his way through the items, he found his eyes trailing up ever so often to look towards Katja. It was only for a moment before he realized he was becoming dangerously close to locking eyes with her once again and getting lost in the sea of stormy blue that highlighted her face, before his eyes would shoot back down to his work. Any brief moment where he did offer eye contact, he would only follow that with a smile and then look back down.

"Say what you will about the man's abilities, but your former jailer was quite the hoarder of prodigious artifacts. Half of these items could sell for quite a lot to a museum."

Yes, smart Alistair, anything to change the subject. To avoid the wonderfully perfect moment they had just shared. What better way to ruin that than by turning the subject into a magical collection of the man whom Katja probably hated most in the world? Yes, very smart.

Katja

 

[Katja]

Katja’s lips curled behind the book, a smile flickering across her face as she caught him sneaking another glance at her. At least, it seemed that way. She couldn’t be entirely sure what he could see. He always had that calculating look about him, he saw things she couldn’t, even though it was he who was blind and not her. But, the little smile he gave when their eyes met made her fairly certain she wasn’t imagining it.

Her gaze drifted over to the trove at his comment, her lips pursing disdainfully. “Hm,” she nodded, lowering the book to her lap. “They were his obsession. I obtained many of them myself…” A quiet huff followed, tinged with bitterness. How many times had Evander sent her into danger just to sate his hunger for a little more power? How many times had she returned broken, bruised, barely alive, only for him to demand more?

“You’re welcome to all of it,” she added with a small shrug, her voice flat. “I don’t care about any of it. So long as I have my horse, and enough coin and food to get to Neus.” She wasn’t about to let Evander’s shadow cling to her any longer, not even through trinkets or treasures. The only trinket she had no choice but to keep was the pendant around her neck.

With that, she raised her book again, giving him the space to rummage through the collection for as long as he pleased. Her eyes skimmed over a few more pages, but her mind was to tired to hold onto the words. The adrenaline of the night slowly waned, leaving her limbs heavy and comfortable in the plush chair. Gradually, her head tilted to the side, her body curling deeper into the cushions until the book slackened in her grip. Within moments, her breathing evened out, and she drifted into a quiet sleep.