Private Tales Ash and Iron

[Lorcán]

Lorcan's already frayed temper unraveled further as his father continued to offer advice about his mate, speaking to him as if Maeve's wishes were his to command. The pain and exhaustion coursing through him did nothing to temper his mounting frustration.

"I don't need a fucking medic." he barked, his voice echoing with the raw edge of his anger. A wave of solid shadow surged from his outstretched hand, hurtling toward his father.

Turning away sharply, Lorcan continued up the stairs, his steps heavy and uneven. He silently thanked the Gods for the banister that provided some support.

Maeve, please talk to me, he pleaded silently, hoping she could sense his desperate need to see her.

 

[Midir]

Midir didn't so much as raise a hand, the shadows parted around him as though too afraid to draw close. He kept his steady pace alongside his son.

"The blood you're trailing through my hall would say otherwise," he said blandly but wisely chose not to push the matter further.

 

[Maeve]

I'm learning my place, came the stormy reply, that dark starlight power echoing in every word. I suggest you learn yours.

 

[Lorcán]

He ignored his father entirely. Maeve's words, although cutting, were a relief for him to hear. Lorcan grimaced as he slipped on the stairs.

I didn't mean any of that. Please just let me talk to you.

 

[Midir]

The Erlking gently reached out to cup his sons elbow and right him when he slipped on his own blood, grimacing. Quietly to a servant they passed he requested them to fetch the medic.

 

[Maeve]

Leave me alone, Mae snarled then slammed the door shut on the bond as tightly as she could.

 

[Lorcán]

He didn't have the energy to swing for his father, despite how much he wanted to. He'd been about to protest at least, when he heard his mate answer.

Leave me alone....

Lorcan collapsed to the ground as the bond slammed shut on him, his head falling and tears blinding his drowsy eyes. "I don't want a medic." he said, his tone unsettlingly calm.

"You were right. You're always right." he laughed mirthlessly under his breath, ignoring the tears that fell, splashing along side the drips of blood.

"I can't live with her not wanting me. I can't live with her hating me." he frowned, the crack in his chest spreading. "Break the bond." he pleaded quietly without looking up at Midir. It was hurting him far more than his wounds.

 

[Midir]

Midir watched his son collapse to the ground. Blood smeared down the wall where his bleeding wings touched the marble and pooled around him as thickly as his tears. The medic appeared but hesitated, hovering at the edge of the scene as instead of kicking Lorcan or throwing harsh words in his face, he crouched before his child and gently pushed the locks of hair from his sweat slick brow.

"If you will not believe anything else I say, believe this: to cut the bond will destroy you in ways that may never be mended," he gently willed his magic to the surface and a drowsiness would over come him.

"Sleep, son."

 

[Lorcán]

He wasn't entirely sure if he was hallucinating or not. He couldn't recall a time when his father had been so gentle with him, nor a time when he had called him son without a tone of reprimand or disgust.

"I don't care.. Please..." She wanted to be free of him, no longer wanted to talk to him let alone be his mate or his wife. He had ruined everything, all because of his need to protect her and a rage that he could not control.

"Break it..." he whispered as his vision darkened and his breathing slowed, his broken body falling limp on his father's steps.

 

[Midir]

Midir caught Lorcan as he slumped forward and quietly gathered him in his arms. The Erlking was surprisingly strong despite his slimmer build and hefted the other fae with as much ease as a human would a bag of sugar.

"Come," he said sharply to the medic and strode for his sons old rooms. On his advice, Midir kept his son asleep for a week so the bones and flesh could mend fully, lest he wake and undo the careful work of magic and skill it had taken to knit together bones and regrow flesh. It was only a maid who was in the room when Lorcan finally did awake.

 

[Lorcán]

It was a week wrought with fever dreams and night sweats whilst his body knit back together. Time had done little to heal the aching behind his ribs however, and it was the first thing he felt when his eyes slowly blinked open to squint at the sunlit room. He hated this room, this place. He'd been miserable here. Worthless.

At least for a time, Endora had given him peace, had given others peace, and he had finally belonged amongst his own people. Belonged with her. His jaw clenched, angry that his father had not done as he'd asked. No doubt the Erlking was rather enjoying the torture he faced.

Are you still here... He dared to ask, hoping the faint question would slip through the barrier she'd slammed down on him.

 

[Maeve]

Outside.

The answer was short but the anger and hurt that had added so much bite to the words before was gone, as was the harsh barrier. Her mental voice sounded distracted, breathless even. It was then that the maid opened the balcony doors, letting in the sounds of fighting.

"Focus," The Erlking reprimanded when her control slipped in the second it took to reply to Lorcan. She shot the King a dark look but his impassive face didn't change. He nodded to the target he had her focusing on. She gritted her teeth and summoned her magic again, shaped it into the lethal, throwing star blades he had taught her and then released them. The Shuck opposite her cursed as he rushed to dodge but she brought up another wave of solid darkness, twinkling with light forcing the Shuck to turn again back towards her. He threw his own set of daggers and her throwing stars vanished, and instead a shield formed in front of her like a rippling oval mirror. She only had a second to celebrate her victory for the shield had alluded her all week before her opponent was on her again, sword swinging.

 

[Lorcán]

Lorcan's drowsiness dissipated when he heard her voice. He hadn't truly expected to. He sat up with a grimace, his muscles stiff and tender. He padded over the cool tile floor to the balcony, offering the maid a tight lipped smile before he stepped outside, and his dark, golden eyes settled on Maeve and the scene around her.

His chest tightened, his throat bobbing as he swallowed the ache there. He watched without interruption as she used her power, his pride in her almost painful. The maid came to set a breakfast tray on the small table on the balcony. He wasn't hungry, but he offered a quiet "Thank you, Elenna." to the puca, and continued to watch, he realised, with far less fear for her safety as he once had. If anything, he feared for her opponents.

He glanced up at his father, hating that yet again, he'd taken something from him, that he'd done something better. That he had proven once again to be the foolish boy he so delighted in reminding him that he was.

 

[Maeve]

Maeve ducked and rolled as the sword swung for her neck. The speed of the Shuck was far greater than anything she could have survived as a human, but she was beginning to learn and trust her fae body. Even still she lost a lock of hair to the sharp blade.

"You lost focus," Midir commented even as the Shuck dove for her heart. She stumbled back a step, then another, furiously trying to keep her focus on bringing her sword up to save her life. Her mind was so occupied she couldn't find the time to slip into the state to access that terrifying pool of magic. In a dizzying combination of moves, the Shuck swept her legs out from under her and pressed his blade to her throat.

"Yield," he commented, pressing the tip into the hollow of her throat. Marve glared back but she was spent, physically and mentally.

"Fine," she huffed.

"Say it," the male pressed further.

"I yield, I yield! Arsehole," Mae showed her palms and the Shuck finally stepped back. With a grin he offered out a hand and yanked her to her feet.

"You almost had me that time."

"Don't lie to the Princess, Andras," Midir drawled and the Shuck ducked his head to hide the blush. "You were going easy on her." Marve huffed and folded her arms over her chest. It hadn't felt easy, but then she had been distracted as soon as she had felt Lorcan wake. She knew she could do better and that she would.

"I would advice you leave before her mate turns you into a kebab, however," the Erlking sounded horribly amused at the prospect and Andras quickly saluted and left. "You can stop sulking, Lorcán."

 

[Lorcán]

Lorcan's gaze followed her movements, and Andras' as they moved across the courtyard. She was distracted, and he left their bond dark and silent, rather than allow her to hear or feel anything from him. Too close. Andras was coming far too close to hurting her, and it was difficult for the young Prince to restrain himself from leaping over the balcony and crushing the bastard's windpipe.

The sight of the blade at her throat had shadows licking at his skin, his teeth grinding so hard that his jaw ached and his knuckles white as he gripped and cracked the stone. But he didn't move, and he didn't say a word. He simply watched, feeling every bit the outsider as he always had in this place. Defeated, and unable to take any more snarky jabs at his pulverised heart. He turned away from the sight of her and his father, having a far easier relationship than he had with either of them right now.

He kept the bond sealed shut as he bathed, and dressed himself in his usual black that still consumed his wardrobe, before he headed downstairs.

I'd like the chance to speak with you before I leave, if you'll let me.

 

[Maeve]

You know where I am, her anger had banked over the last week from the inferno it had once been into smouldering embers. She had even sat with him whilst he lay unconscious when she hadn't been trying to control her magic. But despite her distress at seeing him so hurt, she had been unable to bring herself to forgive him. His words when they repeated in her head hurt her anew each time to the point she tried to avoid the memory altogether.

Yes, she might not wish the same things she had in the heat of the moment but she was not ready to let go of the rest of her hurt until he had put it right. So she wouldn't play his games or make it easy. Perhaps then he would remember she was not a child to be ordered about or put in her place.

 

[Lorcán]

Her voice burned across his mind, and the Prince grimaced at the feel of it. At least, he reasoned, she was willing to let him close enough to talk.

His hands were in his pockets and his gaze downcast as he wandered outside, leaning himself against a nearby tree and glancing up at his father.

"Might we have a moment alone?" he asked, calmly, despite how it felt to even have to ask his father for such a thing.

 

[Maeve]

"Why are you asking him?" Maeve folded her arms over her stomach and scowled. The Erlking raised a single brow but looked bemused where with another he might have already struck them down for such a slight. Oblivious to the potential danger she was in Maeve marched off towards the Palaces gardens, dismissing both father and son. Midir gave Lorcan a look that might very well have been pity before winnowing away.

Maeve didn't stop to see whether her mate followed or not. As soon as she entered the gardens there was a loud bark and Balfour bounded over to his distressed to demand affection.

 

[Lorcán]

Lorcan let a silent huff escape him, drawing his gaze away from Midir. She wasn't going to make this easy.

He quietly followed behind her, still keeping his distance from her when she stopped.

"Mae.." he started, feeling his throat constrict with the emotion he felt. With the pain the medic could do nothing for. "Maeve." he corrected himself, feeling he had little right to call her so affectionately.

"I know my apologies aren't enough. But I want you to know that I meant none of what I said to you back home-- At, the Orchard." he swallowed. "I was an idiot. I'm always, an idiot. I know I'm overbearing, I'm just so afraid of anything happening to you again I... When you got angry at me I felt the power you possess, I felt it rise up and I thought.. If I made you angry enough you'd be able to wield it and never be vulnerable like that again. I pushed too far, I know. I just wanted you to know that none of it was true. Your place with me was always by my side. And I know you care about the deaths I've caused, and I'm sorry I couldn't control myself with Mercutio." he rubbed at the back of his neck, looking back toward the courtyard, to where his father had been, his eyes burning like molten amber as they glistened.

"I uh.." he cleared the rasp in his throat. "Endora is yours, if ever you wish to return to it. I won't be there.. It was never meant to be a prison." his brow knit and his head bowed with a gentle shake.

 

[Maeve]

Maeve didn't so much as glance at him as he began his speech for she knew if she did this pull inside of her, the care she felt for him still, would take over. She had to be strong in order to get the apology she deserved. So instead she buried her face in the ruff of Balfours coat and stroked him behind the ears in just the right spot to make his tail thump enthusiastically against the ground. Only when she thought he was done did she finally look up, steeling herself to do so.

"So your answer is to run away?" She asked flatly and settled cross legged on the floor. Balfour set his large head in her lap, blue eyes staring up at Lorcan. "Is this what it's going to be like every time we have an argument? You feel sorry for yourself and just leave?"

 

[Lorcán]

His eyes rose to look at her, his head slowly shaking. He may have infuriated her, but she had crushed him, physically and emotionally.

"I think you made yourself quite clear. You no longer wish to wed me. Wish the bond we share to be broken. Want me to leave you alone and to be free of your prison." he said steadily, despite the pain it caused him to recount.

"I believe, you ran away first. With my father, no less. The man who reminds me how worthless I am every opportunity he gets. The one who murdered the only other female I loved after he fucked her in my bed." his head tilted.

"I've no wish to argue, Maeve. I wanted to know that you are safe, and to give my apologies. I don't deserve you. I never have.. And if this was an argument, then I can't survive another."

 

[Maeve]

Maeve ground her back teeth but tried to keep her temper.

"Don't make it out like you're the victim here. You took my trauma and used it as an excuse for your actions, discounting everything I asked of you. I just wanted to leave what had happened to me in the past, I just wanted to heal..." she took in a deep breath to steady herself.

"I said some things I regret and I'm... sorry. I shouldn't have said them and especially not in anger. But you just told me you had started a war and then told me to know my place when I got angry. I just... saw black," with stars. She'd barely understood the power manifesting in her, still barely understood it now.

"As for coming here... I don't regret it," she lifted her chin defiantly. "There was nobody else who would take me off Endora."

 

[Lorcán]

“I know. You’re right. I don’t know what else I can do, other than apologise to you.” Lorcan frowned, but he couldn’t not be hurt. Could not stop the raw ache in his chest every time he looked at her. And that his fathers crimes were not enough to condemn him was another stab he’d have to take.

She apologised, and then defended with her reasoning. He wanted to explain how far truths worked, how debts worked. He wanted to disagree and tell her that his brothers would have taken her had she asked them to, that his father’s motives were more likely to get to him, than to keep her safe. But, it was pointless, and so he kept his mouth shut, his expression weary.

“As I’ve said.. I’ve no wish to argue with you, Maeve. I’m done arguing.. My brothers will be around..” he told her, and took a painful step back, his wings forming from shadow.

 

[Maeve]

Her jaw clenched when he opened his wings.

"I'm trying to have a rational conversation like an adult. You're 400 years old than me for Fiadhssake---" she took another measured breath and then stood. "Fine. Go and sulk somewhere. Come on Balfour," she motioned to the dog and set off in the opposite direction. The pup looked between the pair with a whine.

 

[Lorcán]

Lorcan watched her go. He was trying so hard to be better, to set his anger and hurt aside and give Maeve the space she so needed from him, but it was becoming more and more difficult by the minute. He leapt into the air, his wings carrying him the short distance to hand in her path with a look of incredulity on his face.

"Rational conversation?" he frowned at her. "I didn't come here to fight with you. I came to apologise to you, which I have, several times, and clearly you're not willing to accept it. If you did you'd stop reminding me what I've done, and what I've said. I may have been an idiot, Maeve, I take full responsibility for all of it..."

"But you have fucking broken me." he clawed at his chest, his voice strained. "Maybe you didn't mean to say the things you said, but they were the truth. Otherwise, you couldn't have said them. You are fae.. Truths and lies work differently here."

"I don't deserve you, I never have. I understand why you wanted to get so far away from me, why you threw that ring at me, why you wish you could break this bond. I just.. I don't understand why you'd go with him." he grimaced and shook his head. He loved her so much, felt such despair that anyone had hurt her that he literally tore the male apart, and yet she'd come here and let his father train her like the daughter he never had. Midir had called Endora her prison, had she told him as such?...

"I will not fight to have you, when that is not what you want. I won't be responsible for making you so fucking miserable." he looked away, shedding tears as he said it, his voice quiet. "I didn't realise you were so unhappy, and I'm so fucking sorry. I brought you into a world that you weren't meant to be in, you'd already been hurt so terribly and.. I was just afraid."