Private Tales Brothels and Broken Things

[Cassian]

"That's--" he looked at her and cleared his throat, reaching for her hand to squeeze some reassurance into it. They couldn't both lose their nerve. When one was breaking down, the other was their strength, and so now what other choice did he have but to step up.

"Mh. Get it done Cass.." he murmured at himself as he searched the table for the right thing to say. Of course, the table had sweet fuck all, and so he drew a breath and his blue eyes rose to her parents.

"What she means to say, is that she's carryin' our child." he said finally, and waited....

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

There is a type of silence only a parent can create. Full of tension, fear, and with the ability to turn even a grown adult into a simpering heap of clammy hands and fidgeting feet. It was such a silence that blanketed the table now as Christopher and Tahlia stared at Cassian and Lexi with wide, startled eyes. Clearly it had not been the news either of them had expected. The silence entrenched itself, making itself at home careless to the stress it might put on anyone else.

That was, until, Lexi couldn't seem to take it anymore. The rush of adrenaline, the fear, the relief the news was out, and her already distressed hormonal body simply gave up.

With a sudden crash the Commander of the White Ravens promptly fainted off her chair.

 

[Cassian]

Cassian's eyes shifted between the two startled faces, the rise of his brows silently willing them to say something. After a moment his lips parted and formed words, but before he could speak them there was a crash beside him and a few gasps and cries from tables around them. Cass was on his knees before he could draw breath, raw panic frozen on his face as he reached for her.

His hand swept across her brow and over her cheek, and he spoke her name again and again with such trembling fear that his voice cracked. Another man lowered to a knee, he didn't know who, but as he reached a hand toward her his free hand shot out with a pointed finger in warning. "Don't you fucking dare." he growled. She was fragile, and she was his, and he didn't need anyone to help lift her from the ground.

He scooped her up and held her possessively close, still urging her to wake up. He'd forgotten about her parents entirely, he could hear the fret but he ignored everything other than the one who'd served them wine.

"You. Where's the nearest doctor?" he demanded, and stormed off in the directions he'd given without a care for anything else. She was the priority, his anger could wait.

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

"Cassian! Cassian, wait!" Tahlia eventually caught up and slid in front of him to force him to a stop lest he run her over. She was panting slightly her cheeks were flushed, not at all the composed woman she usually was. Her eyes flittered from his face down to her daughters before letting out a breath.

"She's fine," she soothed, holding up her hands to stall any angry words before he could explain. "I was the same. When I was pregnant with her. The same," she said and gently rested a hand on his arm. Christopher didn't take long to catch up and appeared at the tail-end of Tahlia's words.

"Oh, yeah. She scared the shit out of me every time. She'd just pass out in the middle of talking, or cooking, or going for a walk," he scrubbed a hand through his hair and gave Cassian a sympathetic smile.

"Come back to our place, the only thing to do is wait for her to wake up," Tahlia said softly and then motioned for him to follow her.

 

[Cassian]

He looked like he might have trampled straight over the woman, though he managed to catch her assurance through the loud noise of pure panic in his own head. She's fine. His brow knit and teeth clenched to prevent him saying something insulting - but the unconscious woman in his arms was certainly not fine. Fuck, he felt dizzy himself, but passing out like he had in the surgery was simply not an option right now. He had been fine then, but she was carrying their child, and she was far stronger than he was.

Cassian stared between them like a man possessed, clutching Lexi against his broad chest that heaved hard with each panic-stricken breath. A single nod stated his agreement to follow them home, but despite their assurances, he wouldn't calm nor let her out of his sight until she woke.

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

Tahlia and Christopher coaxed Cassian back to their apartments and managed, with effort, to get him to take a seat on the sofa with Lexi's head resting in his lap. Tahlia set out some tea and Christopher disappeared out to collect the food they had ordered, commenting on how his wife had always been ravenous when she had woken up. For Lexi's part she mostly slept, her face peaceful and calm.

It was nearly half an hour later before she finally opened her eyes with a groggy groan.

"I had the worst dream... We were with my parents and..." she froze when her eyes finally registered she wasn't in their bed and she sat bolt upright with a wide-eyed look. Tahlia pressed her lips together but kept her temper before gently pressing a cup of tea into her daughters hands.

"Drink."

 

[Cassian]

Cassian couldn't take his attention from her for long enough to have any sort of conversation with her parents. His mind was so loud with fear that it drowned out anything logical that the pair had to say. He just wanted her to wake, but in the meantime he watched her breath, and his trembling hands wouldn't stop stroking her hair for a minute, it was a wonder she managed to stay unconscious.

He'd been staring at her, willing her eyes to open and gently coaxing her with quiet pleading despite her mother's insistence that she'd wake when she was ready. When her eyes opened, he could breathe. His body shuddered in relief and he touched and kissed at her face as she sat up.

"Please don't fuckin' do that to me again." he asked, his words tumbling out strained and tightly-strung and his heart still racing in his chest. He turned to her parents then, a muscle feathering in his jaw.

"You do realise how terrified she's been to tell you about this?" he asked. "Would a bit of reassurance have killed you?" he asked, his voice cracking.

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

"Reassurance?" Tahlia sounded incredulous as her eyes swept to the man beside her daughter. "How could we have reassured her when---?!" Christopher put a hand on his wife's shoulder and gently squeezed, cutting her off before her voice became high pitched. The two shared a look and finally Tahlia sighed and leant back into the chair rubbing at her eyes.

"What Tahlia means - what your mother mean's -" he shifted his look to Lexi. "Is that we thought this was... impossible, kid. The doctors told us when..." he swallowed, the memory of how close he had come to losing his daughter still a raw wound, but he cleared his throat and continued. "We've always had an open door for you and your brother, why would you be scared to tell us something like this?"

Lexi squirmed in the chair and clutched at the fabric of her dress.

"I just... I guess I thought you would think..." she let out a breath and glanced to Cassian before back to her parents. "That it was stupid, given my position... The dangers..."

Tahlia shook her head in exasperation.

 

[Cassian]

Cassian's gaze remained fixed on Tahlia for a long moment before drifting up to her husband as he spoke. His jaw remained tight, and he turned quietly to reassure himself that Lexi was alright. Squirming was better than unconsciousness. He swallowed and reached to squeeze at her hand before he stood to leave the room.

Outside he gasped for air and found a quiet spot to fall apart. He'd thought he'd lost everything, in one cruel moment it might've been ripped from his grasp, and now the panic brought him to his knees and his hands shook as he dragged them up his brow and into his hair to grip it in some effort to pull himself together. His breaths were erratic and painful and his eyes squeezed tight shut as he forced his way through it. He'd suffered similar before, and it'd been then when he'd reached for a strong drink.

"They're alright." he murmured to himself under his breath, and twice more for good measure. He'd give them some time, let them talk, and go back inside when he'd found some semblance of calm.

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

"Here."

Christopher joined Cassian sat on the townhouse steps and handed the other man a tumbler of whisky before setting the bottle between them. He had his own glass which he quickly drained and refilled.

"I think I went through three bottles the night Tahlia had her first fainting episode," he laughed roughly but there was a hint of fear still in his voice even though that night of trauma was years ago. "She's alright lad, they're both alright. The girls are having an emotional mother-daughter conversation so I thought I would join you on the traumatised man step."

 

[Cassian]

Cassian let out a shaky breath of a laugh and stared at the cup of amber liquid in his hands for a long moment before setting it down on the step beside him. "Sorry. I shouldn't have reacted the way I did.." he said, his voice rough with pain.

"I don't know what I'd do..." he began and his words broke and so he dragged a hand down his face with a deep huff.

"I didn't think I'd ever have this. I didn't really know that I wanted it but she's given me everythin'. She just works so fuckin' hard an' all I do is worry. She's stronger than we all give her credit for, far stronger than I've ever been. I just need the kid to be here and for them both to be alrigh'." he breathed.

"My mother died givin' birth to my sister.. As much as I've tried to push it from my mind, its always there, and when she blacked out.." his head shook. "I'm not sure I can take another few months of this."

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

"I'm sorry, about your mother lad," Christopher put a hand on Cassian's shoulder and gave it a squeeze and him a sympathetic look. The risks of childbirth were high and every father knew that when the labour started there was a chance neither would walk out of that room.

"The healers here, the magic that's on offer... the chances are far more slim of something like that happening. Plus Lexi is... well," he laughed and shook his head. "I shouldn't be afraid of my own daughter but sometimes..."

 

[Cassian]

Cassian let out a husky laugh and rubbed at his eyes, his head bowing beneath his shoulders with a huff. "Aye. She is." he grinned to himself.

"I know she's strong, and I don' think she likes me fussin' and worryin' but.. I just want to keep what I got for once.." he let out a shaky breath. His mother, his brother, his sister.. Peter. He hadn't been able to keep hold of any of it. His wife and his father too, he was better off without them but they were still able to tear him apart before they abandoned him. He simply didn't trust life.

"I guess I just do a good job of convincin' myself that I don' deserve this." he laughed mirthlessly. He'd had people tell him how worthless he was so many times that it'd dragged him so deep into the gutter that it'd taken quite some time for Lexi to pull him out of it.

His throat cleared and he looked across at the man with a deep breath. Not once in his life did he recall his own father offering him support. There was a fleeting moment of shame that came with the thought of what his father would have been saying to him right now. It'd have been a hard clip to the ear and a warning to pull himself together.

"Thanks." he frowned. "I'll.. get better at this." he nodded. "Is Tahlia.. Are you?..." Were they happy?

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

"Of course we are!" Christopher boomed and clapped the other man on the back. "Though... I thought I'd be a grandfather when I had a few more grey hairs..." he mused and ran a hand through his almost jet black hair. The only flecks of grey were on the right side of his temple and promised to be the kind of silver women sighed over.

"Tahlia is probably as terrified as you though," he admitted. "I am afraid she is probably going to invite herself over nearly every day. I'll try and stop her from physically moving in but..." he chuckled.

"Damian is going to lose his mind when he finds out he's going to be an uncle. I don't suppose you'd consider having a pet griffon?"

 

[Cassian]

He couldn't help but look incredibly worried about his comments on Tahlia moving herself in, and though he tried to echo the man's chuckle, it was strained and dry. He was kidding, right?

"Fuck no, those things are death tra--" Cassian stopped himself and cleared his throat.. "Perhaps, when the kid is a little older.." he laughed under his breath and ran a hand over his face.

"I actually wrote to Damian already.. I hoped he might visit us, so she could break the news.. I wouldn't be surprised if he couldn't read a word of it though.." he admitted with a wince. He'd tried at least, in effort to surprise Lexi. "She didn't want anyone to know, but its gettin' a little more difficult to hide..."

Cassian breathed deeply, finally feeling some semblance of calm.

..."Gramps.." he cast the man a sidelong grin.

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

Tahlia stepped outside and gave both men a bewildered look to find them laughing then shook her head, fists on hips.

"If you're done giggling like two school girls," she sniffed, but there was a smile tugging at the corners of her lips, "Lexi is starving and--"

"And can speak for herself, mother," Lexi finished, joining the rest of the family on the doorstep. She shot her father an apologetic look then slipped past her parents to press a kiss to Cassian's temple. "I'm sorry, for scaring you," she murmured for his ears alone.

"I am starving though... And as dad ordered all that food, I'm hoping they'll have saved our table."

 

[Cassian]

Cassian turned as the two women joined them outside, his blue eyes brightening slightly as they settled upon Lexi. He watched her closely and as she kissed him he let out a breath that must have been lodged in his chest this entire time, reaching to gently grip her arm as he stood and tugged her against his chest to wrap her in his arms.

"Aye.. I could eat.." he sighed before pressing a kiss down on her head and murmured into her hair. "It's alright.. I'm just glad you're alright.." he breathed deeply before loosening his hold on her, but he had the need to keep his arm around her..

"Thank you, Tahlia.." he winced apologetically with a gentle squeeze at Lexi's shoulder.

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

Tahlia still looked as though the rug had been wrenched literally from under her feet but she managed a smile that seemed more like her usual, all business self.

"I know my daughter portrays me as a 'hard arse' but... this I do know something about," Christopher looped his arm about his wife's neck and pulled her close to press a kiss to her temple.

"A might fine ass, if I do say so..."

"Dad! Kress, stop or I'll be sick all over again," Lexi grumbled but she was smiling as she slid her hand into his and the family made their way back to the restaurant.

 

[Cassian]

Cassian let out a husky laugh and smiled the entire way back to their seats. He did offer the now nervous looking server a quiet apology as he pulled out Lexi's chair and sat down himself.

Things were far less tense, though as they ate and chatted, he checked on Lexi several times, unwilling to let go of her for long.

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

Aside from the dramatics she had brought upon them with her own stupidity, the rest of the lunch went surprisingly well. Talk of course was on the baby. Names, theorising what the child might be like. It made it... real and every now and then she felt a small spike of panic. It was not the first time she thought she would handle a chimera attack far better than the birth of a child. Eventually, they bid their farewells and, after quite an argument and Christopher threatening to carry her home, Tahlia agreed she didn't need to move in just yet.

Once they were alone Lexi let out a breath and leant herself against his side as they walked.

"I'm sorry, Cas. I'm so... Not myself. I'm letting my emotions rule me," if she had thought rationally, she should have known her parents would react with nothing but joy and the typical concern for their child.

 

[Cassian]

The day had been a bit of a whirlwind as emotions went, but as they walked he felt a sense of contentment that'd settled like a soothing blanket, dowsing his anxieties for now. His arm wrapped around Lexi's shoulder and he sighed as she apologised to him, a kiss firmly pressed down on her head.

"You've nothin' to apologise for, love." he murmured, his hand rubbing attentively at her arm as he tugged her in close. "It's new and it's shit-your-pants scary, I haven't exactly been the picture of calm lately either." he gave a husky laugh.

"We'll get through it, an' when little Maverick is here, you'll be like..." he cleared his throat and put on his best feminine voice. " 'Hey, Cass, you fuckin' stallion you, get over here and give me another one... Tellin' you. We'll have babies all over the place." he grinned with a tipsy wink.

"Also. I am full on regrettin' challengin' your father to that extra plate of meat." he shook his head and slapped his own stomach with a groan. "The fuck does he put it?"

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

"Babies all over the place?" Lexi breathed, wide-eyed. Just how many did he want?! Wasn't the one miracle enough? She frantically began to do the maths on how many times she and Cassian could have sex without this ever happening again. If it was an average of three times a day with the odd birthday and special occasion...

The slap to his stomach drew her back and she found herself squeezing her nose.

"Before you arrived my father was quite the champion in the Pit according to my mother. His best friend was a giant and well... He never liked to be a quitter."

 

[Cassian]

Both dimples appeared as he grinned this time, and he let out a husky chuckle. "Alright' lets just.. focus on one. For now." he winked.

He laughed again as she spoke of her father's exploits and sighed sagely.. "Well, the old man's got to move over for the new champ in town. Champ in the streets and the sheets, eh?" he waggled his brows, clearly quite amused with himself.

"Lets go this way.." he rumbled and tugged her toward the main square, toward the sound of music.

 

[Lexi Quinzell]

Lexi shot him a disgusted look; never in a million years did she want to compare her father and Cassian in a contest of 'streets and sheets'. Was that what they discussed when they were alone? Bile rose in her throat; on second thoughts she didn't want to think about it at all.

"Yes, towards the mysterious music. No idea what that could possibly be..." Lexi muttered with a dramatic sigh but the truth was, she was a lot less apprehensive about the rest of the White Ravens knowing than she had been about her parents uncovering the truth. "Do they know why exactly they're celebrating yet?" she raised an eyebrow. The pair had breathed a word to nobody but she suspected a few had pieced it together - Kain, Farah most definitely...

 

[Cassian]

Cassian laughed and turned his head to press a kiss to her cheek before they turned the corner into the square to find it absolutely deserted. There was not another soul to be seen, other than for the small band of musicians, and a lot of lit candles that sat around the fountain, and on tables and barrels that sat outside of the taverns and restaurants.

"Who?.." he asked with a quirk of a brow, carrying on as though he hadn't noticed a thing. He took her hand to twirl her to him as they reached the centre of the square, and the music was something soft to sway to.. "Might I have this dance, Miss Quinzell?" he rumbled as his hands slipped to the small of her back..