Private Tales Reconciliation

[Eleanor]

Alliria. One of the grandest cities in the world.

Eleanor had never been to Alliria before and she was excited that she had been selected for this mission. The mission was a strange one, but she was not one to question orders. They had been sent here to gather information on a merchant who had been screwing over a lot of people in Vel Anir. Just gathering information and bringing it back. No killing. It was going to be an extremely boring trip to say the least.

Her and her mission partner, Mac, had arrived a few hours prior and they had immediately went to the inn that they would be staying at. They were sharing a room and she was already annoyed. Ella had struggled to not kill Mac the entire journey and she was very close to murdering him even now.

"I really do not see why we have to go to the market," Mac whined.

"We need to go because we need to find this merchant before we do anything else. The best place to seek out a merchant is at the market. Crazy thought, right?" Ella's sarcasm was strong as she rubbed her forehead. Gods, she hated this boy. Once she had spelled out the first steps of their plan, Mac agreed to go with her. Stupid asshole.

The market was extra busy since the weather was lovely out so it would be a little more work to find who they were looking for. Eleanor scanned the crowd, looking for the name of the business owned by said merchant. They were told that he had a stall here so that was their starting point.

 

[Zana]

"I'll be fine - we'll - be fine."

Zana insisted as she pushed her husband out the door. Her newly discovered grandmother might have been a frail thing but she trusted her children's lives with her and they made her so happy. Perhaps it was because the old woman had missed out on Zana's birth and life, the daughter of her daughter, and because the twins were another piece of that girl she would never see again but who would always be her daughter. Now that Zana had children of her own she understood. It was why she was so keen to include her in the twins lives as much as possible. It also gave the two of them a moment to breathe. Zana waved him off as her uncle took him to see the new workshop before ducking back inside. She hadn't intended to leave the house until Talus returned but as always with her grandmother began cooking it turned into a feast and she was sent out to the market.

Of course, she left the old woman and her cousins with Grey. The Direwolf was even more protective of the children than he was of Zana herself.

It felt a very alien thing to be without the twins as she wandered through the market which in itself felt alien still. She still felt odd not wearing armour let alone a dress which was far kinder to her still swollen stomach. She shook her head a little to herself as she stopped at the vegetable stall and begun perusing the stand for what it was her grandmother needed. It was there, out the corner of her eye, she caught the familiar movements of a soldier trained from birth.

Almost instinctively she stepped more into the crowds and shadowed part of the market stall to watch. Dressed in armour with Vel'Anirs emblem emblazoned on his chest he strode past with a cross look, eyes sweeping this way and that. Not very smart. An initiate? Why would he be in... her mouth went dry. Forgetting the food she began to quietly stalk after him.

 

[Eleanor]

Eleanor had let Mac go in his own direction if only to allow herself to focus on the mission versus trying to not murder the idiot. He was one of those initiates who shouldn't have made it this far in training. He wasn't good at anything besides annoying everyone he was paired with. Ella rolled her eyes as he disappeared into the crowd. She had shit to do.

--

Mac was just as happy to be left to his own devices as Eleanor was to leave him. He stalked through the market without a care in the world as he debated what he was going to eat for lunch. He, of course, didn't notice the former dreadlord stalking him.

--

Ella finally found the stall she was looking for. She spoke with the young woman who was running it and got the information she was looking for. The merchant had an office in the city and that is where he could be found. Perfect. Now she would be able to set up surveillance so they could get the Intel and go home.

She picked her way back through the crowd to find Mac and update him. It didn't take long for her to find the useless initiate. He literally had done nothing useful. She didn't notice Zana stalking him as she headed in his direction.

 

[Zana]

Zana might have lost her magic but magic was not what made a Dreadlord. Not fully. Part of the training was to learn how to be invincible without it in case anything were to happen. Clearly, nobody had taught this boy a thing though. He spoke loudly after some merchant or other which had to be a ruse else he had been dropped on his head as a child, and he stood out from the rest of the crowd. He also got distracted, it seemed, after a short while and went to find a food stand.

Was this really what the academy was producing now?

The blade she kept hidden in a slit in her dress drew free as she crept closer. No Dreadlord, even if this was a coincidence, was a good thing in Alliria. Even an idiot. To protect her family the safest thing was for him to die.

Suddenly the boy veered off down a quieter street, food in hand, and Zana went around to cut him off half way down the road. He didn't even see her coming. One moment the lad was wandering down the street eating and muttering, the next her blade was to his bare throat and he squirmed under her iron grip against the wall.

"P-pleas---!" a crimson smile split his throat in two as she drew her blade at the first word he uttered. She'd killed hundreds of her own, what was one more?

 

[Eleanor]

Once Eleanor picked up on Mac's tail, she noticed that the woman following him carried herself the same way that she did. There was something familiar. Very familiar. Ella shook it off and continued to follow at a distance. The fact that Mac didn't even notice or care just confirmed the fact that he was an idiot.

She turned the corner onto the quiet street just as the body of the young initiate hit the ground. Ella had unlatched her pouch and pulled out a knife as she walked. She sent it flying towards the mysterious woman without a word. It didn't matter who she was or what she wanted because she had just killed a dreadlord apprentice.

Albeit, she did everyone a favor. Eleanor still couldn't let it fly. The knife was millimeters from hitting the woman in the side of the neck when she turned. Ella gasped and dropped her hand. The knife clattered to the stone below the woman. Below Zana.

"You bitch!" Eleanor was no longer mad about Mac. No, every fiber of her being wanted to strangle her former mentor, friend, and mother figure. She moved in a blur as she launched herself at Zana with a dagger in her hand.

 

[Zana]

Zana whipped her head round as she caught the sight of a blade and her hand raised to snatch the dagger from the air when it suddenly dropped. The woman blinked for a moment; stopping an attack was incredibly out of the books for a Dreadlord. Even if the other knew her from a previous life, even if she thought Zana a hero and not the villain, then they shouldn't have let their blade drop. She found herself caught between using the opportunity to her advantage and using the opportunity to berate the other before killing them. Only when the other figure spoke Zana recognised the voice for the last she thought she would ever hear again and the blood drained from her face.

"Ellie, wai--" there was a cut off curse as her former apprentice sliced towards her. Zana twisted out of the way at the last second and caught the young woman's wrist, twisting it sharply behind her back to get her to drop the weapon. She winced and let go. Of all the ways she imagined this reunion this had not been it. "I don't want to hurt you," she hissed.

 

[Eleanor]

Eleanor sneered down at Zana after she had dropped the dagger. The former Dreadlord had always been faster than her and that hadn't changed it seemed. "Do not call me Ellie. Only one person was ever allowed to call me that and she is gone now." Her words were venomous even as tears formed in her eyes. She didn't fight Zana though. She should've fought her. Every instinct in her body and mind told her to, but she couldn't.

Ella let the tears fall from her eyes and she crumbled against Zana. Every ounce of stress, pain, hurt, and betrayal from the last year came flooding out as she cried for the first time in more than ten years. "You..." She tried to get out between sobs, "you left me!" Ella wanted to hit Zana so bad. She wanted to scream. Again...nothing came out except more tears.

Eleanor had worked so hard to move past her abandonment and it was all for naught.

 

[Zana]

You left me.

They were an echo of the words she had shouted at Sloan's grave. They hadn't had a body to bury so Zana had laid to rest beneath the headstone things she loved. She'd just needed a place to grieve and cry. The memory slammed back into her as Ellie slumped against her and sobbed. The same rage and anger and hurt. For a moment she did nothing, merely stood whilst the young girl cried, and then slowly she wound her arms around her slim waist and shut her eyes. Her chin propped atop the young girls head.

"I had to," she whispered. There had been a list, a long list in fact, delivered by the Generals themselves after the blood bath. "I am sorry, Ellie. I wanted to take you with me but..." she sighed and shut her eyes, holding the girl tighter.

 

[Eleanor]

Ella finally gained enough composure to stand back up to her full height and she wiped her eyes. "But what, Zana?! What was so important that you couldn't take me with you?" Their surroundings seemed to come back into focus and Eleanor looked down at the dead initiates body. They needed to vacate the area as soon as possible and she wanted to talk more. She needed to talk with Zana more.

"We need to get out of here. I..." She paused and looked down at the ground. "I don't want to leave you without answers. I need them. You owe them to me. I also need you to understand what the rebellion did to us at the academy. It's a joke now."

"We. Had. A. Dance. Zana." Each word was punctuated with disgust and bitterness. I needed you and you weren't there. Everything changed and you weren't there.

 

[Zana]

Zana studied the young girls face and then followed the direction of her gaze to the dead boys body. There was a little pang of guilt now she realised he had been with Ellie and slowly she let go of the girl so she could step away. Answers, yes she supposed she owed the young girl that. She would have wanted them to. There were probably a good deal of people she had left behind who wanted something similar to her. The sad truth was was that she didn't have the answers. Not really. Certainly not any that would help them in their new lives.

The dark line of thought was interrupted somewhat by the sudden revelation there had been a dance. A wary, slow smile thread its way across her face.

"Did you wear a pretty dress?" she asked as she bent to pick up the young man's arms and begun to drag him into one of the side streets. In Alliria a murder like this was commonplace. Nobody would question the blood and nobody would actively look for a body. When it was discovered he'd be dumped in the mass graves outside. Zana should have felt something more but all she could think was she had eliminated a threat.

She just had to determine if Ellie was one too.

"I have to ask, before we go anywhere. Why are you here? Was it to find me?" her tone had grown cold and hard.

 

[Eleanor]

Ella let out a low, pained laugh. "Yes, I wore a very pretty dress and got partnered up to dance with Vance Calgrave. I don't know if you remember him..." She had told Zana about the encounter the two of them had had, but it was also years ago in another life for Ella's former mentor. She was talking to Zana like they had never been separated. It was weird and nice at the same time.

"I have to ask, before we go anywhere. Why are you here? Was it to find me?"

Zana's tone made Ella flinch. She was back to the Zana that she remembered. "No, I didn't even know you were here. I didn't know where you were..." A pregnant pause, "or if you were even alive anymore. I had hoped in the back of my mind, but I figured they had already sent some full fledged Dreadlords after you."

She walked over to where the older woman was standing now and she gave one more look at Mac's body. Oh well. "We were sent to gather information on a merchant who pissed off the majority of Vel Anir. Mac was useless so I was pretty much doing it myself. I can't bring myself to be mad he is dead."

Eleanor was happy - truly happy - to see Zana and have the chance to get answers.

 

[Zana]

Zana didn't bother to hide the sigh of relief and her shoulders sagged as the tension left them. Ellie wouldn't lie to her. Perhaps it was a naïve thought but for some reason she knew she was right, deep in her gut. Despite feeling betrayed the young girl saw her as something more than just another tutor and that was a hard bond to abandon. She rubbed a hand down her face and tried to order the rest of her swirling thoughts. Her family weren't in danger. Nobody knew where she was. Nobody knew if she was even alive. The Generals had done a good job it seemed.

"Vance... The lightning -- oh."

Oh yes Zana remembered. Her lips flattened with distaste.

"He remembers what I told him, doesn't he?" she sniffed. She'd made it quite clear what would happen if he touched Ellie again. "I... have somewhere where we can talk. Where I can answer your questions... but you cannot..." Zana took a breath. "Ellie I will kill anyone, anyone, who you tell about this. Do you understand?" She was trusting her and that... that took a lot.

 

[Eleanor]

Eleanor was not sure if Vance remembered what Zana had told him but she had an idea of what lines it was along. Touch her again and I will murder you. That seemed like the closest bet. "He is more handsome than he was then..." She trailed off feeling like a teenager again. A teenager spilling secrets to her big sister.

Ella could see the change in Zana's demeanor before she spoke again. She was serious, scary Zana. "I won't tell anyone, Zana. I may be upset with you but you are the only family I have...the only family I have ever had or will ever have." She reached out and took Zana's hand to give it a small squeeze of reassurance. Eleanor would never let someone come after Zana.

 

[Zana]

Zana took another breath then nodded slowly, then again more assuredly.

"This way, then," she squeezed the girls hand back then let her go so they could navigate the busy city easier. Alliria had never appealed to her like it did her husband. It felt like a rabbits warren with its narrow streets the tall buildings that leaned in to touch one another near the top, cutting of the sky beyond. She felt trapped when she was in here. Firstly she headed back to the market to scoop up her things because she valued her life and her grandmother was still strong enough to deliver a nasty wrap with her wooden spoon. Then she continued on through the crowds and the twisted cobbled streets. It was a long walk but eventually Zana stopped outside a home that looked as unremarkable and as similar as the dozen other homes they had passed. She ran a hand through her hair as if debating her choice before finally pushing open the door.

"Vnuchka! Gde ty byl?! YA zhdal-- Oh."

An elderly woman had appeared from one of the doorways leading off the corridor. Almost half Zana's height and wrinkled with the years, her light green eyes were still bright and intelligent. And an exact copy of Zana's.

"Babushka, this is Ellie. A friend," the older woman regarded Ellie with a skewered look. "Ellie this is my... grandmother. My mothers, mother," no doubt this would raise only more questions and it was a long story. The older woman sniffed.

"Skinny, like you were. Come, in, in. I get tea," and off she bustled leaving Zana to show her through and out the back to a sunny room at the back with armchairs and a worn rug. She old dreadlord flopped into one of the chairs with a sigh.

"Which question do you want me to answer first?"

 

[Eleanor]

Eleanor stayed quiet on their journey through the market and the streets. She stayed quiet as the approached the non descript house and entered. She was very confused when the little old lady entered the room they were standing in. Grandmother. It was such a foreign concept to Ella. She didn't even know who her parents were and she wondered if she, too, had a grandmother. She banished the thought to the recesses of her mind where she locked feelings away. The vault that was currently failing her. Miserably.

Ella nodded and smiled at the old woman before following Zana into the backroom. She took a seat in the other armchair and just stared at Zana for a good few minutes before she actually spoke again.

"Why couldn't you bring me with you?" It was the question that had plagued Eleanor. Haunted her dreams and daydreams.

 

[Zana]

It was a question Zana had asked herself many times too. She casually leaned her elbow against one of the chair arms and ran her fingers over her forehead as if scratching her head for the answer quite literally. Her brow furrowed and she looked as if she were about to speak before changing her mind a few times. Eventually she sighed and settled on simple honesty.

"It wasn't safe. There are people who want me and Talus dead for what we did. They would - will - kill anyone we shelter. Anyone we love. It was easier and safer for you if I publicly broke away from you. Abandoned you. My enemies wouldn't come after you."

She pressed her lips into a thin line.

"I lost my magic, Ellie, when... in the last battle. I tried to... I tried to do something that went against the laws of this world and I don't know if or when I will get them back. I wouldn't have been able to protect you."

 

[Eleanor]

Eleanor sat there in complete shock when Zana revealed that she no longer had her magic. What could she had tried to do? That was another question she wanted an answer for, but she tucked that one away for some other time. If there was some other time. Ella had to eventually go back to the academy...right?

"I could have protected myself, Zana. I..." Ella grew quiet and looked down at her hands sitting in her lap. "I could've helped you. They never found you so I would've been safe."

Do not cry. Do not cry. You are a Dreadlord, Eleanor. Dreadlords do not cry. Her pep talk did not work as tears leaked from her eyes again. "I haven't been doing well, Zana. I have terrible rage issues and I have made some...decisions." She thought back to the mission where she and Charon had tortured some pirate smugglers. She had loved it and reveled in it. She wanted more blood. Ella felt torn on if this was truly her or if she was just losing her mind. Both were a distinct possibility.

"I vowed to kill you if I ever saw you again and then I saw you. Everything in me felt like a child who just wanted to hug her mother. Well...I am guessing that that is what the feeling is...I don't actually know what that feels like."

Eleanor finally looked back up at Zana and wiped her eyes again. "Was it worth it?"

 

[Zana]

"Yes."

The answer came without hesitation and without a single hint of regret in her voice. Though she did at least grimace after saying it, realising how it might have sounded or come across.

"I have regrets, I would do things differently if I could have my time again but would I change my side? No. The revolution needed to happen, not just for me but..." her grandmother came bustling into the room with her tray of tea and drink and Zana rose with fluid grace to take it from her and kiss her cheek. The older woman patted her cheek with a toothless grin and then shuffled her way back out. Zana watched her go and then slowly sat and placed the tray down between them then begun to pour the tea.

"It's my fault you are not doing well. I should have explained why I left rather than just tell you I had to go. But I was... grieving myself. My mentor, Sloan, died on that field," her hands shook slightly and she set the tea pot down with a little more force than needed. The scream of agony from her mother figure echoed in her mind as it did every time she thought of her. "It is not an excuse for me leaving you but it is the reason. I couldn't save her with all of my magic and hers, how could I have protected you with nothing? You are still an initiate, still a child. You shouldn't have had to protect yourself," she took a deep breath.

"I was hoping to come back for you, once things had settled more. Or I hoped you would try to find me I suppose. This world we tried to make for you... it was so you could make your own choices like we - like I - couldn't at your age. I had hoped leaving you with freedom would be enough but I should have known it wouldn't be a replacement for love."

 

[Eleanor]

Love. It was a concept that the young Dreadlord still didn't fully grasp. She understood that she loved Zana and she understood that she felt broken after Zana had left, but it was not something that was talked about. Love was a weakness and it had, indeed, weakened Eleanor. Everything since the rebellion - revolution - had changed.

Eleanor's voice was soft as she spoke her next words, "I don't know what to do, Zana. This new world is so different from what I have been taught my whole life. I am weapon that is now being told to blunt my edge. How have you become...normal?"

She was not really sure that normal was the correct word in this situation, but it was the best she could grasp. Zana had lived the same life as her. She had gone through the same horrors that Ella had. The only difference was the last years of study.

 

[Zana]

Zana gave a breathless laugh and ran a hand through her hair.

"Trust me, there is nothing normal about my life still."

Just yesterday her twins had caused a horrendous storm that had destroyed several trees in the street because she had been a few minutes late with their feed.

"But I was lucky. I had Talus even before we left," she smiled faintly and ran her thumb absentmindedly over the wedding band she had never been able to wear whilst still a Dreadlord. "We both needed time to recover after what happened but we had something to keep us going too. Something to make us want to reform our lives. I'm... opening my own bakery if you can believe it," she laughed again - it sounded absurd when she said it out loud.

"What do you want to do, Ellie?"

 

[Eleanor]

"A bakery...can you...bake?" Of course she could bake. Zana was pragmatic and she wouldn't open a bakery if she couldn't bake. It was more that Eleanor couldn't think of anything else to say. The idea sounds so silly to her. A former Dreadlord opening a bakery. What the fuck was happening in this world now?!

Ella thought about her next question as she took one of the tea cups that Zana had prepared. She took a sip and looked Zana dead in the eyes. "I want to kill, Zana." The words were so simple yet so horrible. "I don't know how to do anything else. I am not good at anything else..."

She took another drink of tea and looked out the window to avoid the disappointment that Zana was sure to feel.

 

[Zana]

Zana's brows creased into a frown and she set her cup back down.

"It was a hobby I had to hide for many years after discovering I enjoyed doing it, because if Luana had found out they would have destroyed it," her only love was only ever meant to be the house. And it had been for many years. She sighed and chewed over her next words carefully before speaking.

"What I have learnt being away from Vel'Anir is that no matter where you are, or who raised you, teenagers feel like that," a sad smile played about her lips as she stared out the window thoughtfully. "You're worse off with the built up rage, the training over the last decade of your life. It's only natural for you to feel like that's the only thing you can do because it's the only thing you ever knew. I only discovered baking when I left the Academy. Until then... I was just like you."

She wondered if Sloan had felt this way.

"Have you considered taking some time out once you've graduated? You're only a few months away now and they don't enforce service. You could travel, you'd be more than welcome to stay with Talus and I."

 

[Eleanor]

Eleanor hadn't thought about taking a time out. No, that hadn't even crossed her mind until today. Until she found Zana. There was one major problem with the whole traveling plan and that was the fact that Ella didn't have any money. She wouldn't have the funds to travel or even make it to Zana and Talus. She took another sip of tea and then set the cup back down on the table.

"I appreciate that, but without money, I will not get very far outside the academy. Plus I don't think Talus would want a teenage murder in his house. You both have already gone through the transitions...it isn't fair for me to bring my issues to you." She rubbed her forehead with her thumb and forefinger. Her head hurt and she was so tired. Exhausted, really.

"There are proctors who still beat us, Zana. They do not want the changes and they do not follow them. The academy is a joke now. I don't know if I even want to go back." She didn't have a choice in that regard. She had to go back and graduate.

 

[Zana]

Zana frowned.

"You do have money," it had been one of the few things in her grief addled mind she had actually seen to sorting out before she had left. Sloan had inspired her. Upon her death she'd been told by the remaining dregs of Luana's legal advisors that her mother figure had left her provisions and savings as they were to her. It had made her think to do the same for Ellie.

"Let me see if I have it here," she mused and stood up. When they had left Vel'Anir they had left quite a few things with her family here for safekeeping. They didn't want anything leading people back to their home in the mountain so keeping legal and financial documents and doing business from here seemed safer. Alliria was an ideal place to lose yourself in.

She was gone for a good few minutes but when she returned it was with a large wooden box that was already open and Zana was thumbing through the different pieces of paper.

"It should be... yes," carefully she sat down and retrieved the documents she needed before passing them over to Ellie. On three neat sheets it summarised not only a good deal of wealth - far more than a person would make as a Dreadlord - but property Zana had owned in Vel'Anir, several horses, land and shares in profitable shipbuilding and merchant trades. Eleanor was a rich young woman.

"The majority will come to you when you graduate, but there is a small amount you can access before," small not being the right word for the sizeable chunk of gold scrawled at the bottom of the page. "I wanted you to have the chance I never did, to be what you wanted to be as soon as you left."

 

[Eleanor]

Eleanor held the papers gently as she read over them. Her eyes widening the more she read. She was rich. Eleanor...a kidnapped dreadlord initiate...was rich. It seemed surreal. She read every word in silence as tears welled up in her eyes.

She looked up Zana when she spoke again and wiped her eyes. Ella set the papers down, stood up, and then bent down to wrap Zana in a hug. It was an awkward hug but a hug nonetheless. A hug that said thank you and I love you.

"Zana, this is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. What if I wouldn't have found you? No, nevermind. Don't answer that. I just," Ella fumbled for the words, "thank you."

She was crying again but this time it was tears of joy. She was being given a chance at life. A chance at a life she wanted.