No sooner did the door to her room shut than Yuna collapsed onto her bed, burying her face into her pillow and with her arms folding up its sides to encase and shelter her head as much as she could with it. Building and building, there came in short time the bellowing cry she smothered with the pillow's muting embrace. For a time she couldn't even think. For a time she merely lay with her face pressed to the now damp fabric.
Yuna didn't know when she had rolled over, when the dividing line between near-suffocating herself with her pillow and staring up at the ceiling had been crossed. But it had. Similarly shrouded, the first of her thoughts on the whole matter—she found herself wholly swept up in the middle of them.
What was she going to do?
What was she going to do? Was Zael merely toying with her? Did he show her that letter to gloat, to say "I can tell you straight to your face that I'm going to betray you and there's nothing you'll do about it"? Did he have something else in mind? Why even show her the letter at all, or even bother with any of this, if he was just after the artifact? Why not just swoop in with that fancy fire magic of his while the expedition was on the way back to
Elbion and take it then, after all the hard work was done? Was it just somehow easier to backstab them all during the expedition? And Gier! And Herrim! She was going to look like such a fucking idiot to them! She was going to look like an idiot to everyone! A big stupid idiot with smitten eyes and rosy cheeks who got played like a fiddle and taken advantage of by the one person she ought to have known better about.
Or...
...could Zael have actually been telling her the truth?
She didn't know. She just didn't know. She
wanted to believe it, yes. But how could she? What room was there for hope when the memory of Rostok was so strong? They had by chance encountered one another in the
One-Legged Flamingo, and there she saw that Zael was a different man: his hair longer, his one eye gone and the other turned blue, his face seemingly older beyond just the single year's difference. But these were superficial things. Could he really be a man so changed? He had followed orders from "the Republic" in Rostok, and if he wanted to fight for the "Rogues" more than for the Republic, and it really seemed like he did, then why on
Arethil would he disobey their orders?
But only if you trust me. Only if you let me.
She wasn't sure she could do the former. Not yet. But maybe...maybe she could do the latter.
Let him prove once and for all...everything.
Everything.