Fable - Ask May the Spirits guide your Journey

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Click. Slick. Click. Slick. Click.

White's paws were having trouble finding a grip on the mostly hard stone floor of the mushroom cave. But she didn't stop. She needed to get her human out. The female was worthless and barely was contributing to saving her human was sure death. At least that was how it was going in her eyes. Her eyes which were feeling watery and itchy as things seemed to blur.

The dog was beginning to be effected by the cave and it was happening more quickly than it had happened to both her human and the female standing there next to her. She was having trouble smelling anything along with her blurry vision. Legs found it harder and harder to drag as teeth found themselves loosening more and more with each passing moment.

White began to worry. How could she get her human to safety if she fell into sleep as well? She couldn't and she knew it. Then she slipped and stumbled backwards. She was moving to retake her place when she realized something. The female had collapsed and stopped as well. Did she now have to save two people? No. She would save her human and if the female died then she died. Family was the most important.

Then the dog became aware of where they were at. No longer were they in the cave but now back to the safety of the path outside of it. They had a chance to survive. So she laid down by her human and weakly licked his face until she too past out like the other two.

=============================

Time past. Minutes. Hours. Or perhaps just seconds. It was impossible to say in the lack of celestial light. But eventually Weylin's eyes finally opened once more. His head was throbbing. It was throbbing severely. What was worse however was that his face felt filthy.

Weylin just laid there. He laid and tried not to think. It hurt to think. It hurt to just exist. The pain in his back was intense, as it had honestly always been, but it reminded him that he was alive. He hoped he was alive at least. If this was the eternal dream then it meant he had earned nothing but suffering at the end of his life.

Eventually the pain eased or he got use to it enough that he could he could think. His eyes no longer blurred. He saw white fur. It was White. She was laying next to him as always. A comforting thought to have. But something did feel off. He held something in his hand. With a bit of effort he got his fingers to fully open and saw a strange mushroom there. Why was he holding this? When did he get it? He didn't know. Not much was remembered. He remembered entering the cave then nothing until waking. He must have picked it during the black time.

Weylin closed his fingers again to protect the mushroom then rolled over. A wince from the pain in his back followed. He saw a petite orcess there. It was Zeri Rekani. He tried to say something but his throat was far too dry and his lungs too weak still to get any words out. So he gave up and reached out with a shaky hand to pat whatever part of her body it was he could reach then slipped back into sleep.
 
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Zeri lay on the ground. Breathing. Writhing--however meekly. Tiny little moans and whimpers escaping her throat in those early moments.

Little else.

It reminded her of the time she had been playing with her elder sister, running around Mhartoc's Stables. Round and round they went, two young orc girls, when--in a disaster of timing--Zeri caught a horse's kicked hoof to the chest. Just a small scrap of it at the very end of the kicking motion, but it was enough to knock little Zeri flat on her back. She had trouble breathing, couldn't see straight, and it was the first time she had ever seen her elder sister lose her composure and panic. One of Mhartoc's sons checked her out and said that she was lucky not to have any broken bones from it, and that she'd be alright. Hardly any comfort. That comfort only came when Ma showed and picked her crumpled body up and carried her home and set her to rest in bed.

And Zeri wished she was there now. There in her bed again, back home, back with her family, even if her elder sister had gone out abroad and wasn't there. Ma was there, and so was Pa, and that could make everything alright again.

But that wasn't happening.

She'd gone out adventuring. Like she had wanted to. And this adventuring had led her here, to this cave, to this cold, to this pain in her head and crushing fatigue in her arms and in her legs.

Eventually.

With time--time that was difficult to measure.

The burning of exertion faded, and Zeri could move her limbs again. Soreness pervaded still, but she could at least move. And she heard a small rustling. A soft pat on her right boot.

Zeri sat up slightly, a mere flexing of her abdominal muscles, to see down the length of her body at who or what had touched her.

"Weylin!" she said, her voice craggy and not quite as strong as she had hoped.

She swiveled her body around and crawled a bit closer to him. Their heads were facing one another now, their hands. Similar to the way Zeri and her sister used to just lay in bed with their knees bent and feet dangling in the air, just laying in bed facing each other and laughing and giggling and talking about their respective days.

Zeri took off her gloves and grabbed one of Weylin's hands and squeezed and with her other hand reached to his face. Patted it (not gently, but not roughly), scratched lightly his cheek with her nails, patted it again, pressed her hand to the malleable skin of his cheek and vigorously wiggled--all small attempts to rouse him from his sleep.

"Hey, Weylin. Weyyyyy~lin. You have to wake up. You can't sleep. This is like the cold's grasp, it's got to be. You're pale and weak and if you sleep it can't be good. Please don't...don't let the miasma take you. I'm sorry. I-If I'd been faster. Stronger. I..."

Yes, she still retained little embers of being upset. Tiny, nagging, unresolved doubts about Weylin's intentions--even if the Dwarves and all their words were not to be trusted.

But she didn't want it to end this way. Because of his misunderstanding that she was feverish, and her misunderstanding that he had been in danger.

Weylin Kyrel
 
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Sleep was a reward. Relief from pain. Relief from fatigue. Relief from the waking world. Dreams provided better versions of events. Strikes made the proper way so that an injury was avoided. A deer dropped with a single arrow rather than a quiver. No flames. No blood. No problems....

And then Weylin found his eyes opening. Something was irritating him. Something was playing with his face. Every little action drug him further and further away from dreams and back into reality. The reality of his head aching and his torso in intense pain from his back injury. What his eyes were met with was the sight of Zeri looking back at him.

Pretty.

And then came the aching from her voice. The chirping was sending daggers of pain through his head with each little syllable. He winced a bit at it. His lungs were still weak so he couldn't really say anything. But he could move a bit and he had come here for a reason. The orcess was sick and he had made a sick person save him from his own stupidity. How low could he get? Lower than the depths of any dwarven mine.

The hunter moved his hand holding the mushroom over so she could see it then opened up his fingers. It was one of the healing mushrooms the dwarves had spoken of. A tiny thing yet so powerful. He motioned with his other hand that it was for her. Hopefully she understood his gesturing and would take it. Hopefully she would get better and all of this pain he had caused would have some meaning.

As the human waited for the orcess to take what she needed to cure her fever his mind wandered a bit. Had he started to fancy himself some kind of hero? It seemed so. He had started to look at himself as if he would have songs sung and his story told for generations to come. But what had he truly done? He couldn't save either of his parent's lives. He couldn't save his town from burning and his home from being wrecked. He had avoided getting eaten by giants that didn't even want to eat him to begin with. And now he was having to be saved by this orcess who he was suppose to be saving. A truer hero never did exist. The kind that failed.

No, Weylin knew he was just a hunter struggling to keep him and his dog alive. Every little act of kindness was nothing more than his attempt to right his failures in the past and live by the traditions of his mom's people. It was not even his own traditions. Those died along with everyone from his town. Perhaps it would be best he joined them rather than so selfishly clinging to life and justifying his survival by helping those who didn't even need the help.

Zeri Rekani
 
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It was working. It was working!

His eyes were opening. And, up close again and with a belated noticing, the idle thought that his eyes had--to Zeri--an orcish quality to them. A mixing of green and brown, like many of those tribesorcs who harbored a quiet intensity, a sureness of strength.

Zeri let go of Weylin's hand and pulled the knot of her loincloth loose and pulled it away from her face, exposing her relieved smile. Whether or not her recent misgivings were warranted, she was glad to see him alive.

He opened his hand. Opened it before she could say anything. The motion of it caught her eye, and she glanced to it. Saw the mushroom in his palm, and, initially, her eyes widened in with fright and panic. Then she remembered what the dwarf--that dwarf--had said, about the healing shrooms in the cave. Oh she retained her doubts, alright, but it was at least possible that the dwarf was telling the truth. Crass, rude, and deceptive as he was, he hadn't lied about everything.

So Zeri looked straight on to Weylin again and shook her head and said, "No, no, no. I don't have a fever, Weylin. I never did. Don't...don't ask me how I know that you thought I had a fever, it's a little complicated. But I don't. Have a fever. You need that, okay? You need that mushroom. I'm fine, okay? Fine."

As if to underscore her intent, she cupped his hand that held the shroom in both of hers and pushed it toward his face. His mouth. Said, "And don't be stubborn, Weylin. I-I won't let you! You eat that mushroom and you get better, alright? You have to, because there's nothing else I can do for you. And...and if that dwarf was lying about this too, about that mushroom being good for you, then I'll...I'll...I'll go and curse him! Or bring a shaman to banish him!"

Then her eyes softened as she let thoughts of the dwarf go.

Her face beseeching as she looked to Weylin.

Weylin Kyrel
 
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The orcess had her cure. Weylin had at least done something. He wouldn't say it was good. Good implied it wasn't a near disaster that got them all killed. That was the third or fourth time they had barely missed slipping into the eternal dream. So it was not good. It just was. She was cured. He was in pain. Everything was how it should be right now.

Then she began to chirp again. Chirp. Chirp. Chirp. How did her lungs hold enough air for all of it? The action didn't bother him, not anymore. As he had told her it had become sort of calming and he had grown to enjoy it. But it was amazing how she could get so many words out with such a small chest.... He didn't mean it that way. Surely she would never know he had that thought. Hopefully she didn't. He prayed she didn't....

And the mushroom was shoved into his mouth. Hands held it shut in there so the coughing and gagging did nothing. The hunter was forced to chew and swallow to avoid suffocation. The thing tasted foul. Not just bitter but slimy and moldy and disgusting. Medicine never was good tasting. The wise ones said that was how you knew it worked and how nature kept you from taking too much. This mushroom would be the most powerful medicine ever to exist based purely on its taste if that was true.

The human wasn't sure how he had enough breath and water in him to get the mushroom down but he had. And forced to take it against his will he wasn't happy. Her words about not having a fever hadn't reached his brain yet from his ears. He thought she had given up her chance on getting better and it made him feel all the effort was wasted on him. So he did something to voice his feelings.

Weylin weakly grabbed Zeri's hands with his own and pulled them away from his mouth. A frown was on his face. He said in a very hushed voice rough from the coughing, "Are you trying to kill me?" His hands remained wrapped around her own hands. They were warm. Both his and hers. Some color was already returning to his skin, but it was slow. While he was not noticing the subtle restoration of his health the orcess might be able to. The dwarf hadn't lied. The mushroom was actually good for healing.

"It was for your fever. A waste on me but not on you. You're more important."

During all of this the big white dog just tried to sleep. She was exhausted from everything that had already happened that day or night or whatever time it was. She was no badger. She didn't know how to tell time under the ground.

Zeri Rekani
 
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It didn't feel good to force him to do that. To eat the mushroom. B-But it was for his own good. He wasn't going to do it on his own, especially if he thought that she needed it--that much she knew about him, alright. But even though he wasn't in that cave and actively breathing in the miasma, it was still inside of him. Or if not, then the harm it had done still lingered. Either way, the healing mushroom (that DWARF better not have lied about this) should help.

He chewed and swallowed--visibly not happy about either. He pulled her hands from his mouth.

"What?? No! No, I wasn't trying to kill you, you needed that, Weylin! You almost died in there!"

It had been rough going down, the mushroom, but he hadn't started choking or vomiting or turning purple or showing any other symptom of poison Zeri knew of. The pallor, now that she took a second notice of his skin color, seemed to be fading. And his hands were warm, not bitterly cold like when they'd just crawled from the canal water. That was good.

Zeri blinked. He must have been a little delirious still, or--admittedly--too preoccupied with the taste of the mushroom and unpleasant method by which she'd forced him to consume it, because he still thought she had a fever. And...(oh gosh)...her heart gave a small flutter at those last few words.

Zeri pinched her eyes shut for a moment as she summoned the capacity to swing her body around and pull herself up and sit cross-legged before him. Her hands still held by his--weakly, but he at least could.

"No, Weylin, it wasn't a waste. I didn't have a fever--I never did. I...I don't know if those dwarves tricked you into thinking that too, but they certainly by the Spirits tricked you into going down that cave unprepared."

The tiny voice of her nagging doubt spoke from the back of her mind, saying her deed was done and she still had a quest to attend to. Little twitches of her face betrayed this, but she said nothing of it yet.

"How are you feeling? Are you okay? Thirsty? Hungry? You have to be hungry, you didn't eat. But...do you think you'll be well? A-Aside from the ribs. Sorry."

Weylin Kyrel
 
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Without a mushroom that tasted worse than death itself in his mouth to distract him, Weylin actually was able to take in what the orcess had to say to him this time around. It seemed she didn't have a fever. That was a relief. His body language even showed this fact as it eased up a bit when she mentioned that fact. It also was in part due to the mushroom as well. But his tension wasn't as bad now and it was a good thing for his general health.

And the orcess was still chirping. The thoughts on her lungs and chest floated back to his mind. With it also came him remembering his earlier thought, which tricked his eyes to drift to that part of her body as she was now sitting next to him rather than laying down. No good. He tried to look away as soon as he realized where his eyes were at and soon found them drifting to the ground instead as it was always a safe place to look.... But the ground was her lap and she was not wearing a loincloth even if everything was covered up.

The human's face took on a red hue as he blushed. His eyes darted from her lap to the side, which meant her thigh, and he noticed how plump and firm her thigh and butt were. He liked thighs and butts like that.... Why was he even thinking about that right now? Nothing was working so straight up his eyes went. There was no stars or clouds or sky only stone with some glowing crystals in it above. But it was the only safe place to look right now.

After that the hunter's mind began to refocus and organize itself after the fluster of confusion. What all had she said? Oh yes. He remembered now. The spirits, no fever, and asking how he was.

"Thirsty. Hungry. In pain. But alive so good. The female spirit didn't mention it was dangerous. She just said there was healing mushrooms and what they looked like. Thought she was trying to bed me not kill me. Think it is better she wasn't trying to bed me."

Wait.... The orcess didn't have a fever so.....

Weylin finally allowed his gaze to drift down and stopped when his eyes met Zeri's eyes. She had nice lips and pretty eyes. "Why were you red if you had no fever? Is something else wrong?" The hunter was frowning in worry.

Zeri Rekani
 
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Weylin looked to be a little bewildered as to where he was, glancing around like that. It made sense. One moment he was in the mushroom cave, the next he was somewhere outside of it. He had to get his bearings, of course.

Thirsty. Hungry. In pain.

One of those could be helped. Zeri had to lean quite far to reach her pack, but she did and she dragged it comfortably close and opened it. Took out one of the waterskins Weylin had earlier refilled.

Thought she was trying to bed me...

Zeri froze for a discernible second. Resumed the motion of taking out the waterskin and returning to her sitting position after.

Why were you red if you had no fever? Is something else wrong?

Zeri unstoppered the waterskin and let her eyes drop from his and to her hands doing the unstoppering. "No. Nothing else is wrong, Weylin." And she presented the waterskin to him, her kindness more obligatory than genuine now, and this feeling touching her eyes.

A curt command. "Drink."

Weylin Kyrel
 
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The behavior of the orcess was strange. First she was being nice then for no reason she suddenly got upset and curt with Weylin. What had he done? Nothing was the answer. They were just speaking and he told her what she wanted to know. After that he had simply asked about why she got red.... That was it wasn't it? Something else must be wrong. Her behavior changed when he asked her about it. She could deny but it definitely was something else that was wrong here.

The hunter attempted to get his body to sit up. It was not working so well. Certainly he could speak and use his limbs a bit better but the pain in his back was intense and he had little energy in him. But he struggled against it. Wincing and grunting from the pain and effort he eventually got himself sat up. By the end he found himself breathless. Was his body so weak now? It scared him to think of himself in such a state here in the Spine. But that was a concern for later. Right now it was important to find out what was ailing the orcess and get her back into proper health.

Weylin looked at Zeri once he had himself sitting cross legged on the floor as well. "Something else is wrong. What is it? Broken bone? Foggy head? Buzzing head? Body hurting in general? What is wrong? I can't help if I don't know what is wrong."

And the human just sat there staring at her with a very serious look on his face. His eyes showed his determination to finding out so he could see her getting better. No thoughts of himself seemed to cross his mind at all. None truthfully did. None while he was convinced another needed help. The pain and agony of his own body and mind were ignored. The pain and agony he shoudln't be ignoring were pushed aside.

Zeri Rekani
 
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Zeri's eyes narrowed a bit. Her lips pressed into a thin line. A quick flick of her eyes to the offered waterskin and back up to Weylin. A frustrated puff of air from her nose, and she stoppered the waterskin again and placed it back inside of her pack, saying, "Fine. Don't drink any then."

And Weylin started asking her more questions. Just...just flat out disregarded what she had told him! She closed the flap of her pack and started to tie it shut.

"No, I said nothing was wrong. I don't have a broken bone or a foggy or buzzing head or pain in my body. You have all of that. Not me."

She had her pack closed and ready for travel. And she just rested her hands on the pack and the straps and stared down hard at it as she thought.

She wanted to know. To know if the black-haired dwarf was right about Weylin wanting nothing more than to "claim" her, but it was a difficult question to ask. Not for reasons of heavy emotional weight--she was already plenty frustrated and upset enough to just candidly yell out the direct question. No, it was a different reason, one that made the whole ordeal trickier than it seemed.

Zeri had, on a few occasions, been chaperoned inside a tavern or drinking hall in Bhathairk; she didn't drink, even after she received her neck tattoo, but she did talk to her traveler chaperones and watch them interact with their fellow foreigners. One such chaperone was a human from Alliria, partaking in gambling with a couple other humans and tribesorcs at a table, playing a game with cards. He explained to her why he held his cards the particularly guarded way that he (and the other players) did.

He didn't want to "tip his hand." To reveal something that ought not be revealed.

And this was where Zeri found the difficulty in asking the question. If she tipped her hand by phrasing it poorly, she'd never get the truth, if indeed his intent was merely shallow in nature. And, distantly in the back of mind, an exasperated part of her wondered why this even mattered so much: she was alive, he was alive (if injured and weak), and she still needed to get out of the heart of this mountain and find that flower and bring it back to the Circle of Shamans in Bhathairk. That's what mattered.

She sat with her hands on her pack and that hard stare down at it and pondered some more.

Then turned her head to glance sideways at him and asked, "What if you had died, Weylin? Trying to find a remedy for a fever I never even had. And would you look at yourself? Look at yourself, right now. You're half dead, asking if something's wrong with me. I don't need help. You need help. Help that I can't give you. And yet you're ready to go charging off, ready to keep at it until it kills you, like...like you have nothing to live for. Why?"

A tiny moment passed. And she asked again.

"Why?"

Weylin Kyrel
 
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The hunter had completely forgotten that the orcess even had water on her and had offered it to him. It was not until she got upset, well more upset, about him not accepting it that he realized it was even there. But it was too late now for him to get a drink. It was put up and the girl was just not having any more of helping him it seemed. That was good. This was about helping her after all not him.

Then came the little rant about how nothing was wrong again. Weylin just couldn't believe that was true. She turned red before and had gotten upset at him when he asked her if something was wrong. She was still getting upset at him for asking. It had to be something or else why would she be acting this way? She was just trying to be nice and be strong. She might be petite but she was still an orc. They always had a need to put on a strong front no matter what. Perhaps it was their culture or just something they were born doing.

Silence followed however as the human didn't want to press the issue just yet. She clearly didn't want to talk about whatever was wrong and as difficult as that made it for him to know how he could help it was best to let her open up in her own time. It shouldn't take much longer now as she was clearly thinking about something. It may have been the words and how she said it that was bothering her or just getting a good enough explanation for him to follow....

Or perhaps she didn't even know what all was wrong. That made sense. That made a lot of sense. She didn't know and that bothered her. It was why she got upset and why she was lashing out at him. It was something he had seen in people and animals plenty. It also explained why she was thinking so hard right now. She was trying to figure it all out so she could tell him.

But when she finally spoke it caught the hunter off guard. Weylin blinked a bit. She was talking about him. Why was she talking about him? She was the one who was the priority here. She was the one who mattered. He wasn't worth being the focus. Things needed to go back to being about her. He needed things to go back to being about her.

He didn't know what to say or how to change the subject of the conversation. Zeri was so focused on speaking about him and had asked him directly why he was doing all of this. Perhaps he should give her an answer. Maybe that was how he could get her to open up on what was wrong. But what would he even say? He didn't know. Thinking about himself was something he actively avoided doing. Best he focus on surviving and helping others in need. He was alive. What concerns could he have?

Several long minutes had past as the human was deep in thought, so deep if she said anything to him during it that he didn't notice she had said a thing. But finally Weylin came back into the moment and looked right into the orcess' eyes.

"You have family. You have people and a place to return to. That makes you more important. It makes your life more important. It is my duty to see you return to it all alive and well. It is what matters and what is important and what needs to be done."

The man had to pause for a moment to reset himself as he had gotten a little worked up towards the end. It hurt his still tender throat and lungs to speak so much and so forcefully. It only took him a second to recover enough to continue.

"I don't matter. I'm not important. You do and are so I need to do what I can until I can't. If I don't then me living means nothing. It would have no point."

Zeri Rekani
 
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Zeri's focus had been firm.

Then, as the first minute passed by in silence, it wavered. Nervousness crept back in. Graduating to anxiety as another two minutes went by and Weylin said nothing. A toxic tinge of fear then, as Zeri thought that perhaps she had asked a question so inflammatory that Weylin would lash out, surprising her with a resurgence of strength that she before thought he lacked. Another minute. Why wasn't he saying anything?

Unconsciously, Zeri had inched back away from him. Her pack now partially between them. She considered just getting up and putting on her pack and grabbing her spear and hurrying away--she could always get new gloves and a new loincloth, for both seemed dangerously too close to Weylin.

Just do it. You saved his life like the Little Wizard asked. Just go see if he'll clear the path like he said. Just go.

She had a hand on the right shoulder strap of her pack when Weylin finally spoke.

And her expression slowly sank as she listened. Aghast. The concerns about what the dwarf had suggested and doubts of Weylin's intentions shrunk to nothing in light of this; for while this was an answer no man of such a mind for shallow claiming would give, it was so shocking that she wished instead that Weylin did simply have said mind.

"Weylin, how can you say that about yourself?"

That was...that was such an awful way to view the world and his place in it. Everyone had a place in the world. Everyone and every thing. The smallest blade of grass to the tallest tree, the tiniest insect to the most massive dragon, the baby only just birthed to the eldest tribesorc; the sun and the storms, the fire and the ice, the dirt and the water; all the good things and all the bad things, all the joys and all the sorrows, all the light and all the dark. The Spirits pervaded Arethil, and in them duality. Life was not possible otherwise.

For Weylin to think that he didn't...matter? At all? I-I-It was shameful. An affront to her most foundational Animistic belief about life and the world she lived in.

And the more she processed his answer, the worse it became. He completely lacked respect for himself, to view himself as he through his admission said he did. He had no sense of pride; while only some orcs were boastful, all maintained a pride of themselves and their tribe (so far as Zeri knew and had ever seen). The nobility of selfless sacrifice, exemplified in all of the tales of legendary warriors and heroes of old that Zeri adored, had somehow turned to poison in Weylin's blood. And how could his duty mean anything if he ascribed no worth to himself, the very bearer of that duty?

And yet it got even worse. Weylin had for himself no purpose. No purpose, save through others. He had made himself akin to a shadow, an insubstantial pocket of darkness formed only through the presence of someone else. Without that someone else, his living "meant nothing" and "had no point." So of course he had thought something was wrong with Zeri. He needed something to be wrong with her. Whether it be trivial deprivation or grievous injury or illness, he needed something to be wrong, for it in its vampiric way was the only path to life he allowed for himself.

It...

It was...

Pathetic. Sad.

He was a deeply broken man. He was the horse that would not run, the fish that would not swim, the wolf that would not hunt. He had allowed for the death of his spirit.

Zeri's expression was reproachful, pitying, and slightly horrified--all these at once. She inched back again, as if now worried that Weylin's malaise was somehow contagious.

And she said, "You...that's..."

She shook her head slowly. Pulled her pack around and started hoisting it onto her back. Preparing to leave.

"If you believe that, then I shouldn't have rescued you from that cave. Because you're already dead."

The sheer meanness of her words stabbed through her own heart. But they were, inescapably, the truth of how she felt.

Weylin Kyrel
 
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The expression on the orcess' perplexed the hunter after he had finished speaking. Confusion. Shock. Disgust. Anger. So many things played across it and then she berated him. She asked him how he could say what he had and that he never should have been saved because he was already dead. What did she mean by that? He gave her an honest answer and this was how she responded? A frown crossed his own face as he looked at her just standing there ready to leave. But she hadn't yet. She was staying to mock him and berate him and look down on him. For what reason at that? Because she was an orc and they enjoyed pain and suffering. The ones who had taken his family away were the same. They cut down everyone. They bled them all dry. Took their lives as well as their livelihoods. And all of it only because they were sadistic monsters that reveled in the suffering and agony of others.

Then Weylin realized what exactly it had been he said to her. It made him sound suicidal. It made him sound as if his life meant nothing. That was why she was behaving this way. That was why she had said he was already dead.

The frown remained on his face, but it wasn't directed at Zeri. It was directed at himself. He was never the best at words. His father wasn't either. That was always more his mom's thing. She was the trader and talker in the family. But even before he was never this bad at words. This was something else. It was as if he hadn't interacted with another living soul.... How long had it been since he spoke to someone else? Really spoken to them that was. Not the quick exchange of words to barter or quickly spread some news amongst the Old Folks he ran into. When was the last time he sat down to speak what was on his mind and in his heart? Not since before he lost everything.

The hunter attempted to stand up. The action caused him to grimace from the effort and the pain. His body felt as if it was made of pure granite and not truly connected to him anymore. And half way up he failed. He failed and fell back onto his ass with a painful thud. It actually got a grunt out of him that caused White to look at her human for the first time since they escaped the cave. How pathetic was he going to get?

After a second to allow the pain to his behind and ego to fade Weylin finally spoke up. "I'm sorry. My words were bad. Very bad. What I meant was you still have your family, your tribe, and your home to return to. I don't. I lost everyone. My family. My friends. My community.... I don't want that to happen for you."

The hunter looked at the orcess with a serious face. "I can't let that happen to you. No one should suffer that pain as well." The human had to pause for a bit. He was feeling a bit worked up and with it came the memories. Memories of blood. Memories of fire. Memories of death. But it past quickly. A blessing. And with it gone he continued. "That is why I said I'm not important. I can't lose what I've already lost, but you still can. So I want to do for you what I couldn't for everyone else."

Zeri Rekani
 
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Zeri got her pack onto her back. Adjusted the straps. Turned toward where she had previously dropped her spear, but before she could take a step toward it, Weylin tried to stand up. Failed. Landed back down to where he started.

She stopped. And, like Weylin, a frown touched her face. Was that it...was that why he had tensed up before Zeri had a chance to cut his hair? Were those the memories he had spoken of? Well if so that was awful. Everyone. Everyone? What could have even done that? And why? Such an evil and terrible thing was beyond her comprehension.

He had a noble goal, but it was again tainted by his insistence that he wasn't important. He was--in effect--removing himself, the very person who would be striving to achieve that goal and who ought to be taking pride in it. It bothered her to no end. He was as a warrior with a deathwish, not as a warrior with the hope of surviving an imminent battle. He was so focused on death when he truly should be focused on life. It was...like he would have welcomed being left needlessly in the mushroom cave to die, so long as Zeri completed her quest and made it back to Bhathairk.

She stood there for a moment, then took off her pack and set it back down on the cavern floor. Sat down across from him again, crosslegged and with her hands on top of one another at her ankles, arms locked straight. She eyed her hands for another moment, then looked up to him.

Said, in a tone that was a touch rigid and formal, "That is a very awful and cruel thing that happened to you, and much more to your family and your friends and your home."

She breathed. In and out. And the hard look on her face was made to soften. Though she found his current worldview repellent, he needed empathy, not judgment. In light of what happened, of what brought him to it, she had to at least try.

So she said again, allowing now for the genuine sympathy for his loss, "Awful. And cruel."

Zeri took in another breath. Readied herself to quietly voice her concerns, and did so, "But if you wallow in death, it will become you." A slight shaking of her head. "And when you say that you are not important, that is resignation. Giving up. The death not of your body, but of your spirit."

She puffed up her chest a bit. Said, "I journeyed to the Spine because I care about my people and I want to help them. But that caring means nothing if I don't think of myself as important, as worthy of receiving that same love that I'm giving to others. Don't you see? It all starts with you, Weylin. And I can't help you with this. No one can. Only you."

These were some of the most difficult things to say to anyone. And Zeri could only hope that something would reach him.

"You cannot grieve forever, Weylin. You may have lost much...but you still have you."

She kept eyes on him. Firmly. Despite the weightiness of it all, she couldn't let her anxiety nor the sorrow of empathy for his loss ruin her resolve and her gaze.

"Don't lose that too."

Weylin Kyrel
 
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The orcess was sympathetic of the hunter's past trauma. It was expected as she had a kind heart, but as she spoke it caused him to begin to frown. She was preaching to him as if he didn't already know or understand these things. For her it seemed so simple yet she had never experienced it herself. He knew it was not right of him to be upset at her right now, but he was. After everything he had gone through in less than a year's time and was here alive it almost felt like an insult.

After a bit Weylin said, "Have you met giants? Seen dragons? Attacked by the dead walking like the living?"

The hunter's eyes were serious. He had paused but didn't seem to really expect an answer. After a bit he shifted his legs around for some comfort.

"I was almost eaten by giants but instead joined them on a hunt for a dragon. I escorted this lost woman through the Spine with the dead trying to kill us. I faced dragons again and watched them battle each other. And now this struggle with the troll and cave. If I wanted to die I would be dead. Either by giants, dragons, the dead, trolls, or just letting the harsh nature of the Spine claim me. But I'm here alive. I'm here to help others so they don't die. So other families don't lose loved ones. I can't be scared of death or I can't do what I need to."

With that Weylin took a deep breath and cast his gaze down. Memories of all the things he had been through came flooding back. Fire. Snow. Wind. Blood. Rot. Stone. It was as if his life had turned into a hero's adventure. But he didn't feel like one. He just felt lucky to be alive.... Perhaps that was what she was sensing and why she was saying those things about his soul dying? He wasn't sure.

Eventually he looked back at Zeri's eyes. "Sorry. Getting emotional." He took another deep breath and tried to calm himself down a bit more. His head was throbbing again. It had been too long since he had done anything close to eat or drink. And his back was hurting. All of it was reminders of the life still flowing through him.

"It was orcs that killed my family and destroyed my community. Some tribe we didn't know. They wanted blood. They set everything on fire. They looted, but it was hardly the point. It was more of something else they could do to hurt us before they buried their axe in our backs. It was sudden and violent, like a blizzard. And like a blizzard all that was left when it was over was ash covering everything like fresh fallen snow."

He didn't know why he was sharing this with her. He didn't know why he was sharing all of this with her. It didn't change things. It didn't matter in the end.

"We need to find that flower for your family." He said then began to try to stand up again.

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He seemed adamant in his ways, Weylin did. Zeri sat and she listened and she let him talk (and it was the most he had said in any instance).

She hadn't met giants nor seen dragons nor been attacked by the dead. She had her own experience with the Amalgamation that threatened Bhathairk, but that didn't make for a substitute for any of those things. Still, when he said "If I wanted to die I would be dead," she didn't believe that. Unless the Old Soldier Zeri had talked to was wrong, warriors with a deathwish did not fall on their own swords. No, they continued on, but in an unspoken way regarded death higher than they regarded life; the Old Soldier had seen it a number of times, tribesorcs and human men who had lost comrades becoming like this.

It was...frightening to think about. Nothing like the songs and tales and stories.

Then Weylin revealed who had done that awful and cruel act to him, his family, his home. And Zeri looked every bit as shocked on the outside as she felt on the inside. Surely it wasn't...tribesorcs who had done it? From Bhathairk? She knew there were other orcs across Arethil who held different traditions and temperaments to her own tribe. But, why though? Why would those orcs--of her tribe or not--do such a thing? What happened? Were they just bloodthirsty marauders? How did they allow themselves to become like that? Zeri knew on a quiet level that the tales of glorious battle against men and fellow orcs were different in character than those against the monstrosities of Arethil, but...were there men and orcs who were as evil as monsters? And that thought was even more frightening to think about than warriors who had suffered deep loss and let go of their spirit.

Zeri didn't even register that Weylin had said, "We need to find that flower..." until a few seconds after he did. After he was attempting to stand up.

She blinked. Once, then several times in rapid succession. Said, "Okay." Far less talkative now.

She let the disturbing thoughts become sequestered in her mind as she refocused on the present: that she was still in the cavern containing to the little dwarven port town, still with Weylin, who still had his ribs injured and his body weakened by that miasma.

Zeri leaned over and collected her loincloth from the ground and stuffed it into the pocket of her winter pants--that would be attended to later. Grabbed her gloves and put them back on. She stood up, with only a mild lingering and simmering fatigue in her arms and in her legs from dragging Weylin earlier.

"Can you even stand?" she said, watching his attempt. His attempt which diverted her attention back to the matter before the orcs were mentioned. A matter which, with dashed hope, she resigned herself from. She was glad for the help, but saddened that it was the only thing which gave Weylin's life any meaning.

But there was nothing she could do. She couldn't make him find inherent value in himself. And once she was gone and back in Bhathairk, he would wander the Spine, searching for someone else to give him purpose. Drifting from one to the next.

Weylin Kyrel
 
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Standing up for himself was painful. The effort of getting his stone legs to move was taxing. He didn't know if he had enough energy left in him to do such a simple action. His body shook visibly and sweat began to form. But the hunter managed to push past it all and stand. He breathed in and out of his nose vigorously. It was more as if he had just sprinted from a troll right now than simply stood up from a seated position.

The orcess was standing there waiting on him. Good. He didn't have to worry about waiting on her then, as if he couldn't use a moment to right himself fully after the effort. White noticed that her human was on his feet so got herself up as well. The big white dog was clearly tired as well but not nearly to the degree her human was. He was at his limits yet refused to accept it. Typical of him really. Soon enough they would be in a safe place and he would sleep till he was restored once more.

The hunter stood a bit wobbly for several moments. Once his legs felt stable under him he nodded to the orcess and slowly began to head back towards their little camp. He needed to recover his items if they were going to move on. As he walked he swayed a bit, which caused the dog to naturally move in next to him to provide him support. It was obvious this was not the first time the two of them had been in such a position like this.

The journey back was going to take some time with how drained the human was still feeling. This was the part were silence would normally reign but the human didn't want to be forced to focus on his own thoughts of how much trouble he was having right now with simply walking. So he decided to do some chirping of his own.

"Why do you need this flower? What purpose does your people have for it? Why were you sent alone to retrieve it? They know how dangerous the Spine is.... I hope."

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Zeri had to resist the powerful impulse to help him. To either lend a shoulder to help him stand or assist him in sitting back down. Spirits, just look at him though, trembling and sweating and breathing like that. He was pushing himself to an extent that wasn't necessary and it was painful to watch.

But she had to. Just watch. Just watch and hope that he'd actually see this too and admit that he didn't need to kill himself like this for her sake. She reckoned that she could protest until the green of her face turned blue, and Weylin wouldn't relent. Maybe...maybe if he felt how injured and depleted he was then he'd come to the sensible conclusion. Have an actual concern for himself.

And he didn't. He found his footing under terrible stress and exhaustion and by some miracle didn't go toppling over.

Zeri wore a worried frown through it all, then accepted it for what it was. She gathered up her pack once again and went to collect her spear from the ground. Followed after him. He was heading back in the direction of the port town, which Zeri initially balked at--but he did leave some things there. Also, the cooked rabbits were still around their makeshift camp as well, and that would do well for both him and his dog. Maybe...well maybe she ought to insist on cutting his hair. Try and force him to accept a little something good for himself; and, incidentally, buy a little more time for him to just rest. They couldn't stay here forever, but that broken rib of his wasn't going to help them at all out in the wild.

He asked her a question--a few questions--as they approached the abandoned dwarven buildings, though. Odd, but welcome. Better than an awkward silence.

Zeri said as she walked, "Yes, we know the Spine is dangerous. But it's no more dangerous than anywhere else on Arethil. Of course, right? There's bad men and monsters and beasts the world over. And I wasn't sent alone, I wanted to go by myself."

Zeri held her spear off to the side in one hand and reached up with her other hand, pulled down the collar of her winter parka to expose the tattoo going across her neck. "I'm of age. See? That's what this tattoo means in my tribe. And this isn't the first time I went out my own, Weylin. I've been out of Bhathairk before, living on the land by myself for days at a time. I know that may not seem like much to you, b-but I have to start somewhere. And that's what this is, this journey. A-And I'm honored that the Circle of Shamans entrusted me with this task! I'm bettering myself--my skills, my ability. Because that's what I want to do: journey like this more, and farther from home. I want to see the world and be able to tell my own tales."

Maybe it was a not-so-discreet jab at Weylin and his renouncing of self-worth, but she had to say it. If only for the lukewarm hope that it might be inspiring enough to eventually set him back on the path.

She held her spear in both hands again. Said as they walked through the horrible, aftermath-laden streets of the town, "That flower--the Urdelveogg--it's called an Edelweiss in Common. Ur-delve-ogg. E-del-weiss. Edel...weiss? Veiss? I'm not certain on the correct pronunciation, the written form is different from the spoken. Anyway...a great monster called The Amalgamation attacked Bhathairk, and no one knows why or where It came from. But the Circle of Shamans have a way they could possibly find out, and the flower is needed for that."

Weylin Kyrel
 
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Each step was slow and painful. His legs were finding themselves to be better as more and more blood flowed through them but his back was getting worse. Just like nature every muscles seemed to be connected and the back was the core of that connection. It meant every little jolt from foot pressing and pushing off of stone found its way to the place his ribs were not so solid. An ebb and flow followed as pain came and went yet seemed to always reach further out as it washed in again. Was this what it was like during one of those high tide things his father had told him about at those seas where there was more water than even in Crobhear Lake?

The answers from the orcess just made the hunter frown a bit. His thoughts came out as words before he really meant to speak, probably because of the pain taking away some of his focus. "The Spine isn't like everywhere else. It is far more dangerous than most places."

He paused realizing he had spoken. Since his mouth had already opened and gotten him into a hole he might as well continue to dig. "My community was mostly of settlers from outside the Spine and those who were from the Spine had traveled out of it for a time. My father was a settler. My mother was a traveler. Everyone said the same thing, that the Spine is harsher and more dangerous than the lands below."

It was not his own experience on this he was speaking from. He was too aware of this fact. All he had known was the Spine. All he had known was the trees and the snow and the stones. All he had known was the various and deadly creatures that called it home. The elder troll was only one of them and while a rarer one it still was not the most dangerous things you could run into out here.

"I've only lived here. I've not experienced anywhere else." He turned his gaze to Zeri. "Is your home full of trolls, dragons, giants, and many other things? Are your winters full of snow often piling up higher than your head? Do the winds rip loose clothing off your body and tear walls not made of stone or wood apart? Blizzards, rock slides, and floods normal for you?"

The hunter waited for an answer? He was not mocking her but seemed genuinely curious about it. Tales told to him about the outside all seemed to agree that it none of it was so common there. The outside sounded so peaceful and calm when compared to the land he called home. But it could just be everywhere was the same. It could be those tales were just exaggerations to make him work harder. It was normal for tales to become grander over time after all. Why should ones about the outside be any different?

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Weylin made it sound truly awful. Like it was the worst place on Arethil. Why would anyone want to live here, if it was as bad as Weylin described? Aside from the troll, Zeri hadn't seen any of that for herself; it was as if they were talking about two distinct places.

Zeri glanced off to the side briefly and then back at him, mildly flustered. "What? No. Of course not. I'm from a city. A stronghold, actually. That's what Bhathairk is. The grassland and the forests around it aren't...like that at all. Gosh, Weylin, that sounds horrific. I mean, it's not like I haven't heard stories from m-mountain o-orcs..." An extreme wave of nervousness struck her, mentioning said orcs, but she continued, "And others! A-A-And others! You know, coming from the Spine. Having gone through the Spine. Of course they had stories like that, like what you've said. But. So did people from elsewhere too. I didn't...really reckon that those stories spoke to what it was like normally."

Zeri stepped around the skeletal remains of an armored dwarf in the street. Couldn't help but wonder if, maybe, that very dwarf had once held a similar impression of the Spine that Zeri held now.

Weylin Kyrel
 
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As Weylin listened he began to be reminded of how those who had been out of the Spine talked about it. Some had that same sense of horror about it while others seemed to find the outside boring and unfulfilling compared to it. He didn't know how he would feel if he ever left, or when he left if the wise ones had their way. Perhaps this was why they were so adamant that he needed to leave. He needed to more experience of things other than his home.

"Winter is the season of snow, blizzards, and the worst winds. Spring, right now, is the season of the rockslides, floods, and trolls. The snow melts and it causes rivers to flood their banks and rocks to get loose. The trolls are leaving their caves after hibernation, if they are the kind that do sleep through the winter, hungry. That elder troll didn't eat much I think. Summer you might see more rock slides but is when all the beasts are out. Trolls, mountain cats, bears, wolves, dragons. Just everything is out and looking for a meal or place to sleep. Fall is when the snow and harsh winds begin again. See less beasts, even ones to eat yourself, so hunting gets hard and foraging near impossible. Time of year when the hibernating beasts go to sleep after finding a last meal or two before then. All when the beasts that don't start to starve and get aggressive."

Weylin paused. He was just one of those beasts that got aggressive from starvation. Is that were he fit into the cycle of seasons as well? With the beasts? He frowned a bit not sure and honestly not wanting to be there with them. All of this was what he had learned from his life in the Spine.

"It is not too difficult to survive in the Spine if you learn how it behaves. A living thing as much as you or me. Just respect it and don't take more than you need or the ones left to hunger from your actions will take it back from you."

The hunter looked over at the orcess. "What is life like for you?"

Zeri Rekani
 
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That made an intuitive sense, the way Weylin described the Spine: a living thing. Of course, the mountains and everything that grew on them and walked on them and flew over them were all imbued with spirits of their own. Through the lens of Animism Zeri viewed the world, and this lined up perfectly with her beliefs.

Just respect it and don't take more than you need or the ones left to hunger from your actions will take it back from you.

"Is that what--?"

Zeri immediately cut herself off. The words had just come spilling out of her mouth as soon as the thought manifested in her head: Is that what happened to you and your community? Equal parts fear, shame, sympathy, and curiosity held her gaze as she held her tongue, a multi-colored flare of emotion. She let it go, thinking it more likely that she misconstrued his meaning.

He'd asked her another question, which she gladly pounced upon to leave that thought and the associated question she'd almost asked behind. She answered, "Well, I live in a city with my family. There's my Ma and my Pa, my two brothers, and...well, my elder sister left about three years ago to adventure, so she's not around anymore. I work with my family most days, just right out of our house like everyone else, making shoes and boots or working with leather and hide and fur to tailor garments. Sometimes it's specially made for someone, sometimes we just take it to barter with in the Great Bazaar. And I'll go hunting with my Pa or spear-fishing with my Ma when they go, and that's...hmm, about every other week or so? If I have any leisure time, what I like to do is go to the Gates or to the harbor and...you know...just meet people. Talk to them. Show them around Bhathairk, if they're new. There's plenty of nice people that travel in from elsewhere."

She turned the last corner with Weylin, and the sound of the water in the canal became much more apparent as they approached the familiar dock.

"I like my home. I love my family too. But talking to people who have come from afar, or who've traveled out to somewhere distant and come back...there's really something majestic about it. Wonderful. Being able to go and see far away lands. The journeys and the friends along the way. That's the spirit of an adventure and it's something that I truly want to experience for myself."

Maybe she would never be as strong as the Lone Warrior, as the Armored Thirteen, as Caliane the Angel of Fire, who all saved Bhathairk from the beast of the Amalgamation. But she sure did dream about it.

Weylin Kyrel
 
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"Adventure uh?" Weylin replied after having listened to what Zeri had to say to him. Her idea of adventure sounded off to him. She reveled in the idea of the unknown but it terrified him. Unknown plants might poison you. Unknown animals might eat you. Unknown people might slaughter absolutely everyone you know and love.

The human's demeanor was obvious now and much less guarded. His thoughts had gone to a darker place for a bit. White even noticed as she made a bit of whimper and rubbed her face on his leg. A pat and a pet was her reward from him. His mood seemed to lighten up as well.

"I've never been to a city. Parents did. They are just big towns with walls yes?" Weylin said as he was still trying to distract himself from how badly he was still feeling. "Why do people like them so much? Walled towns are cramped and smelly. Too many people around as well. It just sounds terrible."

A surge of pain shot through his back. He winced from it and his steps got out of sync for a couple of steps. He got himself straightened back out and continued on. The sound of the canal water was soon joined by the smell of fresh water. They were even closer to their camp now. It wouldn't be much longer until they arrived at it.

"Why.... Why do you want to adventure so much? The world is beautiful but it is also dangerous. What draws you to seek it so much?"

Zeri Rekani
 
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Never been to a city? At all? S-Sure, Zeri herself hadn't been to other cities around the world (and certainly hadn't been to exotic lands like the Amol-Kalit desert or the Eretejva tundra) but...well, she thought cities were commonplace. Each one different in character, yes, but the city environment in general--readily available for anyone and everyone. It took Zeri a moment to realize she had, once again, tacitly impressed her own life experiences upon others, even though she knew well enough that this was hardly the case.

"Yes," she said. "Y-Yes, you could say that. Like a town, but bigger. Some towns might have walls too, I think. Probably. Likely. Bhathairk does. N-Not to say that Bhathairk is a town, that's not what I meant. Just that it has walls. They make you feel safe, walls do. And it's not...that cramped. Or smelly. I haven't noticed any smell."

Despite saying that, she inescapably became intensely self-conscious now over whether she had some particular smell or not. Could she tell if she did? If she lived in the city all her life, would that have made her used to it? Unable to smell it? That wasn't...was that how it worked? She hoped not. She bathed. She bathed all the time. In a sense she had bathed when both she and Weylin had fallen into the canal waters. Regardless of all this, a mild bubbling of embarrassment ran down the back of her neck.

Their camp was ahead. The coalfire still burning, the Spirit of Fire delightfully alive and well in it.

Weylin winced, and Zeri glanced to him and her own face contorted with empathized pain. He just refused to help himself, disregarding his own well-being for her sake, and that was probably the worst consequence of all that came from his lack of self-worth. In a way it made her feel responsible for the suffering he was enduring; if she wasn't here, then either it wouldn't have happened, or wouldn't be continuing--he, presumably, would actually care about his own injuries if he was alone.

He asked her about adventure, and she regarded him for a moment.

Said as they walked, "Well, for those reasons I've already said. The majesty and grandness of it all. Seeing those far away lands I've heard and read so much about with my own eyes. Meeting new people and seeing their homelands. Traveling inspires tales worthy of being told, and like I said, I want to be able to tell my own. All I've ever done was hear the tales of others: people coming to Bhathairk on their own travels. I've always been the listener, never the teller. I mean, what would I tell? Oh, today, I finished making a nice pair of moccasins; Oh, I caught a bucket-load of fish; Oh, I tanned some leather. There's plenty of people in the world who enjoy that life, a-and it's not that I dislike it! I'm not saying that. Of course I love my Ma and my Pa and my brothers, of course. But ever since my elder sister went out on her own, ever since that even became a possibility to me...I really couldn't stop thinking about it."

She smiled. A beaming pride filling her as she said, "My heart settled on it, and so that's what I'm going to do."

Weylin Kyrel
 
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Weylin listened to Zeri begin to ramble on as she cheerfully discussed cities and why she liked the idea of adventure so much. A bit of a frown crossed his face though as he thought over his own feelings on things. On cities. On adventure. On life.

"Walls don't make me feel safe. They trap you. My town had some walls of wood and earth. It became our cage. No one could flee easily into the safety of the trees. They just burnt the walls down when they were done killing everyone like they set all on the buildings on fire. If anyone survived the slaughter then the fire got them and they had nowhere to go because even the walls to save us were on fire."

That was a grim line of thought. Weylin realized it a moment after he had got done speaking. It pained him to think of what happened to his people but it had also already become rather matter of fact to him. He had lived it and gone through it in his head over and over so much, especially right after it had all happened, that he had become use to it. She hadn't gotten to that point and it might horrify her.

"Sorry. Not a pleasant thing of me to say." Weylin said as he looked over at the orcess. They had finally reached the camp and he moved his way over to his stuff. As he did he noticed all the things he had gotten for Zeri before were dumped on the floor.

The hunter pointed to all the items as he looked to the orcess. "Looks like you got lucky. Nothing is broken. Sorry I panicked you into rushing after me."

He went on over and got himself sat back down. He picked up one of his waterskins and began to drink from it. It wasn't until the fresh, cool water hit his throat that he realized how much he needed in. Half of the water was gone by the time he stopped drinking. He pulled out a small bowl from his pack and placed it before White. Water was poured out of the skin and the dog happily began to drink her fill as well.

"My parents traveled when they were younger before they married and had me. Both of them spoke of how beautiful the world was but also warned how dangerous it was if you left certain places. You should have adventures but maybe find people to have them with. Next time someone might not be there to save you from a troll."

Zeri Rekani