The Allirian Account
Issue 01
Arethil: One World, One Community
Disaster in Bhatharik
Written by: Lily Sophia Montgomery
Originally I was going to be writing a piece detailing the everyday lives of the orcs living in Bhatharik. Unfortunately, on my way to the city I was intercepted and warned to stay away due to a terrible Amalgamation. Though I did not see this for myself I felt it important to catalogue the reports of numerous eye-witnesses.
As I like to report only on what can be confirmed I have to caution my readers that I was unable to obtain very much corroborating evidence to these wild tales. I can, however, confirm that notable damage was done to the city and that visitors were barred entry until the mess was better assessed by the Council of Elders and the Circle of Shamans within Bhatharik.
One eye-witness who wished to remain anonymous stated, “we fled as soon as the alarms were raised. I’ve never seen so many of our kind flee in unison before. I’ve never seen so many of our kind die so quickly.” When pressed for information the witness claimed they were unsure if the beast had caused the deaths or something else. ”I saw a huge flash of light and then I saw some of my neighbors dead.”
An additional witness claims they saw a phoenix, ”it flew very high, then erupted in fire. It was the phoenix that killed the beast, I swears it.”
Several orcs, humans, elves, and others had to be evacuated from the city and were taken into medical tents. Nearby settlements have also been offering aid in the clean up and recovery processes. The representative from the Council of Elders agreed to speak with me from this story and though they did not want their name on record they insisted that “something awful” had occurred here but that they would rebuild and recover within time.
A bounty has been offered for any information leading to the origins of the beast. As for me, once Bhatharik is back up on its feet I fully intend to return there and cover how life is going for the residents of the great orcish city. It will surely be a long road towards recovery but from all of us at The Allirian Account we wish you the best of luck!
Important Happenings
Crime on the Rise? Is it a Ratastrophe?
Written by: Cadeyn “Lucky Break” Pedersun
Recent events in Alliria have caused many to wonder why the Merchant Council seems to cast a blind eye onto the rising threat of crime on our fair citizens. According to reports from our agents in the field the sewers beneath our feet are infested not just with rats but with Rous. A rat-like-people-like race of rat-like-people. In addition, the city guard was on high alert for an entire evening hindering this reporter's ability to dine at his favorite Obanese restaurant.
When asked to comment on the situation the Alliran City Watch submitted this statement, “Our steadfast efforts helped thwart an attempt on an upstanding member of society’s valuables. We are still attempting to track down the suspects responsible and will update the Allirian Account as soon as we have these wrong-doers in custody.”
The Allirian Account pressed the watch for further clarification on the reports of rat-human hybrids skulking about in the shadows to which we were informed, “no comment at this time.” This is clear evidence that once again bureaucracy and poor policework are taking precedence over informing the good citizens of Alliria, nay all of Arethil, about the clear and present dangers afoot. I remember in my youth when rats were simply a vermin you could trap with cheese and clever devices. Now they’re stealing valuable antiques and causing streets to close.
We’ll keep our readers updated but as of right now the reports are still trickling in on the subject and we encourage any of our loyal readers to write in if they have any information about the criminals responsible for this heinous act.
Opinion Piece - What the OGRE?
Horses
Written by: Gor’Mash the Face-puncher
The opinion’s expressed by Gor’Mash the Face-puncher are not shared by the staff at The Allirian Account. Reader discretion is advised.
What is horse? Many reader ask Gor’Mash this question. I spend several moments reading scroll about this subject. Turns out, many small species need horse to get around. Not Gor’Mash though, Gor’Mash very fast on feet. Not need some hairy animal to trot Gor’Mash around. One time Gor’Mash walk from Alliria to Elbion in three hour. Pathetic hoomans tried to tell Gor’Mash it take many months for this but Gor’Mash know the truth.
In conclusion, if you own horse do not ride. Eat. Very tasty meat.
Editor’s Note: Please do not eat your horse.
All Magics Considered
Golems
Written by: Professor Freya Winterbane
Editor’s Note: We would like to remind our readers that Professor Freya was once a brilliant mind and that in her old age there may be some slight dementia. Unfortunately, no one else with proper expertise is willing to write on the varieties of magic and we know this is of interest to many of our readers. Please only respond with serious inquiries.
Many mages, witches, and warlocks have tried their hand at the creation of golems throughout their time of magical study. And who could blame them? Having a nifty creature that follows you around and assists with mundane tasks? As soon as I created my first golem I set off to have it clean the dishes, wash the clothes, and tend to my garden. I’ve since gone eleven years without once having to pick up a broom.
The problem, however, is that most do not understand the intricacies of golem magic. You have to imbue a part of your very soul into the creatures and if you’re inexperienced it can have disastrous effects. Once, when I was still tenured at Elbion College (before my well-known accident) I witnessed a young mage-in-training accidently put his entire soul into a suit of armor. He clinked and clanked around for days until senior soulmages arrived back from an expedition to the Ixchel Wilds to restore him to his rightful form.
Anyways, where was I? Right, golems. Golems are exceedingly useful but in order to make them work you have to use an enchantment and enchanting spells do not last forever. If you forget to recharge your golems they’ll end up inanimate and stiff. It’ll take at least four mortals of varying strength to move them if they’re blocking a corridor. That’s why I don’t even use golems anymore. I stick with enchanting broomsticks.
Let me know what other magical queries you have and I’d be delighted to help. Toodles!
The Allirian Account is a semi-regular publications of the happenings going on around all of Arethil. Readers are encouraged to write us back and let us know their thoughts, suggestions, or to ponder any questions of our excellent writing staff.
Issue 01
Arethil: One World, One Community
Disaster in Bhatharik
Written by: Lily Sophia Montgomery
Originally I was going to be writing a piece detailing the everyday lives of the orcs living in Bhatharik. Unfortunately, on my way to the city I was intercepted and warned to stay away due to a terrible Amalgamation. Though I did not see this for myself I felt it important to catalogue the reports of numerous eye-witnesses.
As I like to report only on what can be confirmed I have to caution my readers that I was unable to obtain very much corroborating evidence to these wild tales. I can, however, confirm that notable damage was done to the city and that visitors were barred entry until the mess was better assessed by the Council of Elders and the Circle of Shamans within Bhatharik.
One eye-witness who wished to remain anonymous stated, “we fled as soon as the alarms were raised. I’ve never seen so many of our kind flee in unison before. I’ve never seen so many of our kind die so quickly.” When pressed for information the witness claimed they were unsure if the beast had caused the deaths or something else. ”I saw a huge flash of light and then I saw some of my neighbors dead.”
An additional witness claims they saw a phoenix, ”it flew very high, then erupted in fire. It was the phoenix that killed the beast, I swears it.”
Several orcs, humans, elves, and others had to be evacuated from the city and were taken into medical tents. Nearby settlements have also been offering aid in the clean up and recovery processes. The representative from the Council of Elders agreed to speak with me from this story and though they did not want their name on record they insisted that “something awful” had occurred here but that they would rebuild and recover within time.
A bounty has been offered for any information leading to the origins of the beast. As for me, once Bhatharik is back up on its feet I fully intend to return there and cover how life is going for the residents of the great orcish city. It will surely be a long road towards recovery but from all of us at The Allirian Account we wish you the best of luck!
Important Happenings
Crime on the Rise? Is it a Ratastrophe?
Written by: Cadeyn “Lucky Break” Pedersun
Recent events in Alliria have caused many to wonder why the Merchant Council seems to cast a blind eye onto the rising threat of crime on our fair citizens. According to reports from our agents in the field the sewers beneath our feet are infested not just with rats but with Rous. A rat-like-people-like race of rat-like-people. In addition, the city guard was on high alert for an entire evening hindering this reporter's ability to dine at his favorite Obanese restaurant.
When asked to comment on the situation the Alliran City Watch submitted this statement, “Our steadfast efforts helped thwart an attempt on an upstanding member of society’s valuables. We are still attempting to track down the suspects responsible and will update the Allirian Account as soon as we have these wrong-doers in custody.”
The Allirian Account pressed the watch for further clarification on the reports of rat-human hybrids skulking about in the shadows to which we were informed, “no comment at this time.” This is clear evidence that once again bureaucracy and poor policework are taking precedence over informing the good citizens of Alliria, nay all of Arethil, about the clear and present dangers afoot. I remember in my youth when rats were simply a vermin you could trap with cheese and clever devices. Now they’re stealing valuable antiques and causing streets to close.
We’ll keep our readers updated but as of right now the reports are still trickling in on the subject and we encourage any of our loyal readers to write in if they have any information about the criminals responsible for this heinous act.
Opinion Piece - What the OGRE?
Horses
Written by: Gor’Mash the Face-puncher
The opinion’s expressed by Gor’Mash the Face-puncher are not shared by the staff at The Allirian Account. Reader discretion is advised.
What is horse? Many reader ask Gor’Mash this question. I spend several moments reading scroll about this subject. Turns out, many small species need horse to get around. Not Gor’Mash though, Gor’Mash very fast on feet. Not need some hairy animal to trot Gor’Mash around. One time Gor’Mash walk from Alliria to Elbion in three hour. Pathetic hoomans tried to tell Gor’Mash it take many months for this but Gor’Mash know the truth.
In conclusion, if you own horse do not ride. Eat. Very tasty meat.
Editor’s Note: Please do not eat your horse.
All Magics Considered
Golems
Written by: Professor Freya Winterbane
Editor’s Note: We would like to remind our readers that Professor Freya was once a brilliant mind and that in her old age there may be some slight dementia. Unfortunately, no one else with proper expertise is willing to write on the varieties of magic and we know this is of interest to many of our readers. Please only respond with serious inquiries.
Many mages, witches, and warlocks have tried their hand at the creation of golems throughout their time of magical study. And who could blame them? Having a nifty creature that follows you around and assists with mundane tasks? As soon as I created my first golem I set off to have it clean the dishes, wash the clothes, and tend to my garden. I’ve since gone eleven years without once having to pick up a broom.
The problem, however, is that most do not understand the intricacies of golem magic. You have to imbue a part of your very soul into the creatures and if you’re inexperienced it can have disastrous effects. Once, when I was still tenured at Elbion College (before my well-known accident) I witnessed a young mage-in-training accidently put his entire soul into a suit of armor. He clinked and clanked around for days until senior soulmages arrived back from an expedition to the Ixchel Wilds to restore him to his rightful form.
Anyways, where was I? Right, golems. Golems are exceedingly useful but in order to make them work you have to use an enchantment and enchanting spells do not last forever. If you forget to recharge your golems they’ll end up inanimate and stiff. It’ll take at least four mortals of varying strength to move them if they’re blocking a corridor. That’s why I don’t even use golems anymore. I stick with enchanting broomsticks.
Let me know what other magical queries you have and I’d be delighted to help. Toodles!
