Open Chronicles Dried Moose Meat Anyone?

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It was always the same but a little different at richer families houses. They all wanted the same things, status, material possessions, money, always more. Gweyir didn't understand why having a chair that was worth more than all the other chairs was so expensive. They all performed the same purpose... didn't they?

She was in her own world late at night drying meats, and making stews. All "exotic" tundra foods that made the rich feel unthreatened by the prospect of something new. Bear was asleep in the corner of the large kitchen, his chest rose up and down as she smiled fondly at her friend.

Gweyir was elbow deep in a pot of water skinning carrots with her knife when suddenly she saw a shadow flash across the wall in front of her. Someone had passed by the windows. She glanced at Bear not wanting to wake him but afraid of what'd happen.

There was noises in the house. It'd make sense to steal from this house, it was large, had lots of things, good place to steal from. She stamped her foot gently trying to wake bear, yet nothing happened.

What would happen to her?
 
  • Popcorn
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"Youch," Urchin grumbled in irritation as he fell half the way down the chimney and crashed into the fireplace. Crawling his way out, he attempted to dust himself off, but his clothes and face were absolutely coated with soot, and any attempt to brush off the dirt only succeeded in spreading it around further. After rubbing his grubby eyes on the cleanest section of his shirt he could find, the boy gave the room a quick glance over to take stock of what he had found. "Bloody 'ell, I 'it the jackpot!" he whispered happily to himself. It looked like he'd found his way into the master bedroom, and this couple had gone all out on the trimmings and trappings. Big, four poster bed with silk sheets and curtains. Exotic hand woven rugs and ornaments that looked like they'd been shipped from every corner of the world.

This house was a veritable treasure trove, and Urchin had it on good authority that the family would be gone till the end of the week. That left the whole house ripe for the picking for no good little sneak thieves like him! Of course, Urchin knew exactly what his first port of call would be. The jewelry box! Rich ladies always collected all sorts of shiny pretties. Of course, this woman was so spoiled that Urchin had to go through quite a few boxes before he found the right one. Cosmetics, letters, perfumes... Awh, that one smelled fruity! Finally he found exactly what he was looking for. He wondered just how much money the content of this box was worth. This wasn't any cheap cut glass and painted lead. These were real diamonds and rubies, sapphires and emeralds, all set in real fine silver and gold. With a broad grin on his face, the boy started scooping up and jewels and cramming them into his makeshift little swag bag. He didn't really feel bad about it. No doubt the woman would be devastated, but her husband was rich. He'd soon buy her some more.

Once he was done filling his bag up with jewelry and assorted small statues and decorations (and after he'd sprayed a few squits of that sweet, fruity perfume over himself to try and ease the aroma of soot and dirt) Urchin knew exactly where he was heading next. The kitchen! Rich folk like this always had real silverware in their draws. And so, poking his head out of the door to double check that the coast was clear, Urchin started tiptoeing down the grand stair case to search the house for more hidden goodies.
 
She panicked as she heard rummaging in the floor above her, then the small footprints on the stairs above her. That woke Bear up. She put a long finger over her mouth shushing the bear as he sat himself up groggily.

He sat himself in front of the door and Gweyir armed herself with a iron pan on the side of the door. They had the advantage, right? She stared at the dried moose meat on the counter. She'd protect it with her life. No grubby thieves would steal her prized meats.

So she stood, armed with a frying pan, Bear at the ready, waiting for the blasted thief.
 
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The lad hummed a happy little tune to himself as he made his way through the halls, opening drawers and filling his little swag bag with all the loot he could find. Now, where the hell were the kitchens in this place? He really wanted that silverware! Eventually he found a great, luxurious dining hall and, after snatching a few pretty vases off the table, he made his way to an adjoining room which he assumed must be the kitchen.

Well, this certainly was his lucky day. A huge house filled with all kinds of wonderful goodies. Enough for an opportunistic thief like him to make his fortune! And he had it all to himself. This whole, lovely house, all to his... Oh.

Well, it looked like he wasn't quite as alone as he had initially suspected. There, in front of him, stood a woman armed with a frying pan and... Was that a bloody bear? All color drained from the lad's face as he looked at the bear. "Uh..." he mumbled, looking back and froth between the woman and her pet. Well, it looked like this was it. He'd had a good run, but this time, he was definitely dead. If only he could think of some clever way out of this... Something... Anything! "Chimney inspector, Ma'am," he greeted the woman, tipping his soot covered cap to her. "Jim Smith Esquire at yer service. Just doin' my routine rounds Miss, an' I'm sorry ta inform ya that ya got some real nasty 'igh levels o' soot in yer chimneys. Real bad fer the lungs Miss. Dangerous ta 'ave little children 'round that much soot. When were the last time ya 'ad 'em sweeped?"
 
Gweyir's eyes narrowed. Her common tongue wasn't great, or even good but even she knew when a man was lying. All she really understood was that the brick rectangles off the house that the smoke went up were dirty and he was the brick rectangle maid. With that her head cocked, maids did not have jewels in their grubby hands. She did not understand many people's attachments with the useless opaque rocks, but like penguins they gave the rocks to people they loved. So maybe that's where they learned it from. He looked at her and Bear he was afraid, she could tell by his eyes. Like a deer, when they spied a wolf.

The tall ethereal snow Elf looked at the small grubby boy and laughed. "You." she pointed a skinny finger at him. "You not maid." she sunk down to his level, looking him in the eye as her eyes and face went dark. The shadow of the dark kitchen danced around her face making her look far more ominous. "You thief." With that Bear let out a low guttural sound. He was simply adding to her fear factor, he didn't eat mortals.

She debated bonking the boy on the head with her frying pan, but maybe he wouldn't put up a fight. Her angular hand stretched out flat, palm upwards as she waggled her fingers a bit. A silent cue to hand over the rocks.

Urchin
 
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"You." she pointed a skinny finger at him. "You not maid."

"Wha?" the lad mumbled, taking a step back, extremely confused and also quite worried by the woman's statement. What exactly was she getting at? "No! No, I ain't no miad, I'm a boy!" Maids were girls, weren't they? Was this lady suggesting he looked like a girl? Sure, he was short for his age, but he didn't look that feminine... Did he? Unfortunately, the lad would soon realize that it wasn't his gender the woman had doubts about, but rather his occupation.

The shadow of the dark kitchen danced around her face making her look far more ominous. "You thief." With that Bear let out a low guttural sound.

"... Shit," the lad muttered, looking absolutely petrified with fear. What the hell kind of house had he stumbled into that had a giant bear and some kind of demon lady protecting it? A moment ago, he thought he'd gathered the best haul of his life. Now, he'd consider himself lucky if he made it through the night with his life.

"Please Miss, I didn't mean no harm," he mumbled, handing his swag bag towards her with zero resistance. "I didn't break nuthin'. I can put it all back. Please lemme go! Call the guards on me if ya like, but please dun let tha' bear eat me!" he pleaded, trembling in fear as the beast let out an intimidating growl.
 
Gweyir giggled dryly, and pointed at bear after she had collected his loot. "Bear, he no eat human. You taste like fish." she made a blech face as she told him. Before moving to set the bag on the counter behind her. She couldn't help but feel bad for the little boy who had to steal to make it by, but Gweyir was not dumb. If the gems were missing, she'd be blamed.

She turned to face him again. "Sit." she barked at him and pointed to a chair, as she strode across the dark kitchen to grab a stick of dried moose meat. The boy needed more meat on his bones. He was small and scrawny. She tossed the moose meat onto the table in front of where she told him to sit, before sticking one in her mouth.

"I no call guard. Don't like guard, guard don't like bear." Gweyir explained in her broken common tongue, she likely could elaborate more if she tried, she'd been here amongst people awhile; but she didn't care. Gweyir liked her closed off life with Bear.

After the boy finished eating Gweyir planned to boink him on the head and take him with her, so he didn't come back.
 
"Bear, he no eat human. You taste like fish." she made a blech face as she told him.

Well, that statement both relieved and confused him at the same time. "But... Dun bears like fish?" he pointed out. Probably should've just kept his mouth shut. He really shouldn't be giving this lady any reason to dislike him more. Or giving the bear a reason to consider him a snack, for that matter.

"Sit." she barked at him and pointed to a chair, as she strode across the dark kitchen to grab a stick of dried moose meat. The boy needed more meat on his bones. He was small and scrawny. She tossed the moose meat onto the table in front of where she told him to sit, before sticking one in her mouth.

The lad immediately took the seat the moment the woman suggested it. She was scary, and Urchin had no intention of upsetting her any further than he already had. When she tossed the meat at him though, he was more confused that anything. What was this? ... Oh shit, was this the flesh of the last child that'd tried to break into the house and rob it? But when the woman started eating one herself, Urchin gave a sigh of relief and relaxed a little. She was just feeding him. That was nice! Picking up the meat, Urchin started chewing on it uncertainly before getting used to the taste. "Umm," he murmured happily. "This is good. What is it?"

"I no call guard. Don't like guard, guard don't like bear."

"Phew," well that was a massive relief. No guards and no getting eaten by a bear. Not so bad after all. "Thanks lady. Yer a real peach... So, uh... Ya ain't gonna kill me?" he asked hopefully.