Private Tales Never A Dull Moment

A private roleplay only for those invited by the first writer

Kazar

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The journey towards Maraan was taking an obnoxiously long time. He was hired as a mercenary accompanying a trading caravan moving from one of the smaller Amol Kalit cities to Maraan. The chief merchant was a large and very needy woman that needed to stop to relieve her bladder every hour or so. Kaz was greatly regretting taking up the job, but the promise of coin was too great to ignore.

The sun was beating down on them as they crossed the barren lands leading towards the merchant city. There were boulders and canyons around them, but there was no green. Every now and then there was a brush of wind, but it always carried heat and seared the skin.

Kaz walked alongside the caravan, armed with his sword and multiple daggers on his person. The lower hemisphere of his face was concealed with a cloak that trailed behind him halfway down his back. His job was to keep an eye out for anyone attempting to rob the caravan and he mostly kept to himself.

They were stopped yet again as the merchant now wanted to stretch her legs and wander around. The part giant sighed and leaned against a cart, crossing his arms as he stared off in the distance.

Within moments, he heard a shrill cry and whipped around to look. One of the traders was lying dead nearby with an arrow protruding from his chest.

“Fuck,” Kaz grumbled, “Get on the other side of the wagons!” He shouted to the merchants that began to panic and scream.
 

Tess

Skull like a Coconut, Arms like Toothpicks
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61
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The sun, the sand, the hot air, and, of course, the oasis were the reason many foreigners came to the Amol-Khalit. For others, it was the hum of magic, the thrill of finding hidden cities, and the pulse pounding excitement of discovering magical artifacts. Tess had come in search of what the locals called hajar altahn, or Mill Stones in basic Common. The stones were mysterious and enchanted, able to amplify or dampen botanical magic, or as Tess tended to refer to the niche arcana, 'Botania'. She'd set out for the badlands, even procured a local map of the region (which she was pretty sure was fake once she made it out into the desert), and roamed about with her dowsing rods attempting to find a hidden stone. Unfortunately, she'd not found a Mill Stone, but she had found a number of small trinkets naturally imbued from their proximity to ley lines, a broken sword lodged in a pile of rocks she found, a camel that bit her before running away, and a silver ring on a stick that she sincerely hoped wasn't a finger poking out of a crack in the stone.

And she found bandits. Lots and lots of bandits.

Which brought her mind to the present as she ran full tilt from said bandits. She spotted a convoy of, what she hoped wasn't more bandits, and bee lined it for potential safety. As arrows hissed and sank into the ground around her, she dodged a crevice in the dirt and hoped that the presence of an armed group of travelers was enough to dissuade the bandits from chasing her.

Unfortunately, before she could reach the convoy, she found what had to be the only root within ten miles, tripped over said root, and began to flip head over rear down the scree leading to the convoy and road. The upside was she kept a good hold of her hat and satchel bag despite careening down the slope end over end.

The downside was she'd hit a rock fairly solidly in the first five seconds and landed unconscious in a heap of rocks with a sound vaguely reminiscent of a sack of tubers dropped on the floor.

Kaz Dorvin
 
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Kazar

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9
Character Biography
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“No, I will not go rescue your knitting supplies.”

“You, lower your fucking head or I’ll lob it off myself.”


Kaz felt increasingly hopeless with this group of absolute idiots. They took their time finding cover and half of them were sobbing helplessly while pretending to be invisible. The problematic ringleader merchant that had his money was nowhere to be seen. Well, if she had to empty her bladder, he was sure at least that was done by now.

The part giant unceremoniously stepped over yet another body of someone that saw fit to run in circles in panic before getting an arrow to the face. Kaz went around the wagon and called upon the magic he knew to focus on the earth before him. He haphazardly caused the land to rise up to act as a makeshift barrier from the incoming projectiles. He knew he would hold his own in close quarter combat, but he needed to draw the bandits closer.

It was then that he spotted a projectile hurtling towards them at top speed. Kaz’s jaw tightened as he turned his attention to it before he realized… what the hell? Eyes narrowed in a mixture of confusion and irritation, but he quickly looked back towards the bandits.

“Hey!” A little old lady shrieked from somewhere behind him, “Hey! Hey! That’s a poor little lass over there!”

Kaz’s gaze never shifted away from forward, “So? She’s not paying me. Keep your head down.”

He was perfectly content with leaving the lump of a woman on the ground as he focused on the bandits.

“HOW DARE YOU JUST LEAVE A POOR WOMAN OUT THERE!” Another woman joined in with the old lady, both of them now shrieking at the former soldier. It took every ounce of willpower not to turn and shut them up. He exhaled to calm himself before he rushed towards the useless lump on the ground.

He had applied the armored second skin with his geomancy to ward off against arrows. Kaz leaned down and easily tossed the small woman over his shoulder, even taking care to grab her stupid hat (he could already tell the woman would fuss if he didn’t).

Kaz rushed back and plopped the woman down next to the granny that was screeching about her. The Imperial glared at the older woman, “Find a way to wake her,” He stated firmly, “Nobody gets to take a nap right now.”

With that, he drew out his blade to engage the bandits that were coming in close.

Tess
 
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Tess

Skull like a Coconut, Arms like Toothpicks
Member
Messages
61
Character Biography
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"FUGGINGUZZLEGANG- oh, wait," Tess had shot up and awake. Her dazed mind now absolutely certain she was not, yet again, in the clutches of the Guzzle Gang, a band of beer and ale thieving dwarves with a penchant for murdering their victims by slitting throats or drowning them in beer. That had been a harrowing, and headache inducing, two days before she'd managed to escape not one, but two attempted beer drownings.

Unfortunately, she had two problems. First and foremost, her vision was fuzzy yet again and another splitting headache told her she had another concussion. Second, the bandits were now attacking the convoy which was being defended by a big, muscular man who seemed to be shrugging off arrows.

Literally.

Tess watched as a feathered shaft shattered as it hit the man's broad back and frowned. Either the guy had some serious abilities, very thick skin, or she was hallucinating. In her experience, any one of those options was highly likely. Especially the last one.

Tess grabbed her hat, crammed it onto her head (which she immediately regretted), and dashed off to Tall Broad and Bulky while ignoring the cries of whoever it was that had started to try and protest her moving so soon. She successfully managed to do two things, neither of which was extremely helpful to anyone. First, she couldn't really see too well as double and triple vision and concussions often go hand in hand. Second, she ran face first into Mr Totally-a-Protein-Shake-Not-Steroids' thigh which sent her landing on her tush in the dirt.

She had just enough time to realize Mr Muscles was definitely packing some magical enhancements because the gout of blood from her nose, broken when impacting the large man, felt like she'd hit a solid brick wall. She also had just enough time to realize an arrow buzzed through the air and pinned her leg to the ground by her thigh, immediately sending the limb bleeding fairly steadily.

"Well, shit," came her only reply. The downside was she was now doubly injured. The upside was her concussed brain wasn't accurately registering the pain of an arrow impalement yet.

Kazar
 

Kazar

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Messages
9
Character Biography
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Kazar worked quickly to face off against the bandits that all rushed towards him. Realizing that arrows were useless, they drew their swords and engaged him. It was then that it became quite obvious that Kazar was no ordinary mercenary. The way he wielded his blade with practiced precision and discipline betrayed his military origins.

He was only vaguely aware of something colliding against him, his blade sweeping horizontally right over where the woman’s head had been to parry against an attack. Kazar slammed his fist into the face of another bandit, cracking through the nose and cheekbone in one sweep. He only had moments left with his second skin and he had no intentions of wasting it.

Granny merchant, of course, was shrilly screaming in the background, deeply concerned for the young lass that rushed into the fray for no particular reason.

Kazar yanked his blade out of a dead man and glanced over to spot the woman again, now awake and with an arrow in her leg, “What are you doing?” He growled at her before the distraction cost him. Having given up on grazing him, one of the bandits slammed the hilt of his blade against the side of his head which he hadn’t armored up. The head was generally a smaller target and would unnecessarily tax him when the torso was more likely to catch arrows.

Kazar grunted in pain and took a few stumbling steps back as his vision blurred for a moment. He would need just a second to get back into the fight, but even a second was an eternity in combat.

Tess
 

Tess

Skull like a Coconut, Arms like Toothpicks
Member
Messages
61
Character Biography
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"I'b helbingg!" Tess exclaimed through a bloody, broken nose. The pain in her leg from the arrow was beginning to hit and so was the blood loss. Sure, the human body had plenty and the arrow hadn't nicked an artery, but Tess was, after all, fairly smol and possessed the normal amount of blood for someone of her size, which was in turn a smol amount.

She didn't feel faint or as if she was about to pass out, but she was feeling a tad cold which was arguably worse considering they were, after all, in Amol-Khalit. She spotted Protein Shake take a blow to the head and decided now was probably the worst time to act, which meant it was go time.

Tess forced air out her nose until the wads of blood blocking them blew out, clearing her sinuses. Sure, it started the flow of blood again, but it was important to clear the airway so she wouldn't mess up an incantation or Word of Power.

Muttering under her breath and tasting straight iron, she held one hand up and suddenly shoved the other outward in a pushing motion. Suddenly, the bandits nearby shot backwards, hit with an invisible force. They landed on rears, heads, and rolled across the ground with the strength of the little mage's magic. Tess then swung both hands up over her head sharply, palms up in a wave motion with another word of power. The dust and sand around swirled up and around, blinding those around and hiding her and Mr Muscle from view for a moment.

"See? I helb!" she shouted, the blood in her nose clotting once more as she started to shiver from the cold.

Kazar
 

Kazar

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Messages
9
Character Biography
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Kazar had someone rushing at him but watched them instead get tossed back by an invisible force. He whipped his head to look at the lump on the ground, a crimson waterfall pouring from her nose as she blabbered some incoherent words. She looked as if she were desperately close to taking another nap, and Kazar simply couldn’t afford that.

Being hidden from view and the bandits temporarily being knocked out granted him the opening he needed. Kazar quickly picked up the bow and arrows off a dead bandit, nocking and firing a few in rapid succession. This dropped the blind bandits and several of the ones that were knocked back.

Kazar didn’t wait to see what remained as he rushed back towards the caravan. He initially ran straight past the woman on the ground, heard granny screeching, and then ran right back.

With a less than pleased look on his face, he extended a hand to help her up. He knew right away that her standing up would be a process and he simply didn’t have the time. Kazar swept her right off her feet, carrying her back over to the caravan bridal style while he glared ahead of himself the entire time.

“You led them here,” He stated flatly under his breath so only she could hear. Nonetheless, she had helped in the scuffle and he was a man of somewhat honor.

He set her back down by granny. Kazar tore off a part of his cloak. He took his blade’s sheath and held the leather strap towards her face, “Bite down,” Kazar said nothing else before he yanked the arrow out of her leg. He took a flask from his hip and poured alcohol on the wound before using the bit of his cloak to tightly wrap up the wound. He looked thoroughly irritated the entire time, not even bothering to make eye contact with the insufferable woman that made this day that much worse.

Tess